A strange new life

3.7

I want to say I kicked ass and took names in this first exam, but that would be a lie. The seating arrangement made no sense to me. Some table had only one person, others had three side by side. The exam rules didn’t trigger any alarm bell in my mind. I was pretty sure it was the exact same as the original story, even if I didn’t remember the rules word by word.

Chunin proctors sat one per roll by the walls. There were a lot of proctors here. I would have been intimidated if I hadn’t know what this was all about. I hoped all our training and talk would help Naruto realize the nature of the test.

“You have one hour,” Ibiki growled, “starting now!”

I turned my paper test, read the questions. Question ten would only be revealed fifteen minutes before the test ended. Yep, damn fate.

I turned back to the first question: Decode the following cipher and summarize its meaning. No way Naruto could answer this one. Although, the code looked fun. I tilted my head. I remember seeing a similar code while studying that myself. That made me remember I never re-coded my story book. I shook my head, not time to get distracted. I ran the cipher in my head, tested possibilities, wrote down the answer.

All around me chakra flared, crowding my perception even with me trying to ignore it. People had started to cheat in earnest.

I turned to the second question. It was an integrated problem based on predictions of uncertain conditions and dynamic energy analysis application. I nodded. No way Naruto could answer this one as well, I wasn’t even sure if Sasuke could. I ran the scenario in my head, trying to visualize the problem. Wrote a few possible equations, crossed them, tested others.

A shinobi ahead of me stood up, both hands on the table. “The one thing I’m wondering is how many top ranking teams they intend to pass?”

From the front, Ibiki laughed. “Haha. Knowing that wouldn’t help would it? Unless you’re planning on failing the exam.”

The shinobi sat down. “Sorry.”

The movement of chakra intensified. Some people were subtle, others cheated blatantly. A chakra infused bug landed on my desk, near the question I just finished answering. Way to go Shino! I left the bug alone. Focused on going through the test questions.

A kunai flew from one of the proctors, pierced a test paper just behind Naruto.

The test taker barked out. “What was this about?”

Cool guy proctor, with the fabric crossing his face and square goatee mocked. “You’re out. That was your fifth strike.”

“No way!”

Ibiki had no mercy. “His two buddies, both get out of the classroom. Right now!”

There was some protested, people got dragged. I kept my head down. By the corner of my eyes, I saw sneaky Naruto use the commotion to replace someone else eraser with one of his clones. The proctor took noticed of it, wrote something down. I guess Naruto wasn’t subtle enough, but I’m guessing he at least learned something.

The test went on, more and more teams got thrown out. I had just finished answering the seventh question. After the second one, the questions got even more complicated, with multiple scenarios and possibilities to consider. I had been focused, forgot to pay attention to the room.

“Get ready for the tenth question!” Ibiki barked out.

I jumped a bit. Blinked in confusion. Had it been 45 minutes already? I looked at my test again. Midway answering question eight, which was a analysis and discussion about relative political repercussions of the third shinobi war.

“And before we get to the question itself, I’m adding a new rule. This rule is absolute.” Ibiki glared at the room. “First you must choose whether to accept or reject the tenth question.”

“Choose?” Temari asked from her seat across the room. “What happens if someone doesn’t accept the question?”

“If you reject the question and don’t even try, you’ll lose all your points and fail. Both you and your teammates.”

“What?” a random genin barked. “Why would someone reject the question then?”

Ibiki spoke softly, but his voice carried. “Because of the other rule. If you try to answer and get it wrong, you’ll never be permitted to apply for chunin exams, ever again.”

The classroom half full of shinobi exploded in complaints, alright. Loudmouth Kiba yelled louder than everyone else. Ibiki just glared the boy down. It was nuts. Tension in the room skyrocketed. I wanted to applaud the guy. All the pose and theater and subtle threats. How he manipulated a room full of already nervous people into considering the consequence as something that could actually happen.

In a way, it was a lot like Kakashi-sensei bell test, just with direr consequences. I think if Sasuke had not been affected by the mood, he’d notice the similarities. I put my pen down. For all intents and purpose the test was done.

Ibiki pressed. One genin gave up. Like floodgates open, more and more people opted out of the test. Until Naruto happened.

The brat raised his hand, slapped it on the table hard. Hollered. “Never underestimate me!! I don’t quit and I won’t run! I’ll accept your stupid question. Even if I risk being a genin forever, I’ll still become the Hokage, even if by pure stubbornness, I don’t care!” He stepped on the table, pointed at Ibiki scarred face. “I’m not afraid of you!”

Yeah, I could see why Hinata liked the brat. I even felt a bit moved by his hollering. Still not marrying him. No sir, thank you sir.

Ibiki growled again. “I’ll ask one more time, this is a decision that could affect the rest of your life, quit now while you still have the chance.” The scary jounin tried, but the mood in the room had shifted. The remainder shinobi looked confident, inspired.

“I never go back on my word!” Naruto declared.

Ibiki smirked. “Good call. Everyone who is still here, you’ve just passed the first exam!”

“What do you mean?” Ino asked.

“There’s no tenth question, beyond the whole accept or reject thing.” Ibiki said with a nice smile. Others reacted. Temari got angry, asked about why the waste of their time. Ibiki went on to explain the whole point of the exam. Naruto sad down, arms crossed. Nodded like he understood everything. The brat. He looked back, I gave him a big smile, a thumbs up. He tried to blind me again.

Midway through a question, Ibiki removed his protector. The man's head was a scarred mess of cuts, burns, claw marks, slashes, and punctures—a horrifying sight that killed the mood. Despite this, the jounin smiled as if it were the most normal thing in the world. Still smiling like he was the nicest guy around, Ibiki answered questions, explained the purpose of the exam, which was to cull out people who couldn’t gather information, or didn’t have enough resolve.

“Hell yeah!” Naruto hollered. “Bring it on!” He cheered.

Something, or someone crashed through the window. The blur moved midair. Kunai shot out from the new arrival, sticking to the ceiling and floor. A banner opened behind the woman. The banner coincidentally hid Ibiki, revealing a woman who wore a single wire mesh clothing piece, a dark orange skirt, and a brown duster. She had purple hair, wore shin protectors. Oh man, that’s Anko right?

“None of you are in any position to celebrate.” The purple haired woman slapped the fabric behind her. It had words written on it: Newly arrived second chief command officer, which was a bit unneeded, because Anko introduced herself soon after.

“I’m the second chief examination officer, Mitarashi Anko! Time’s a-wastin’ people, let’s go! Follow me!”