All the Dust that Falls: A Roomba Isekai Adventure

Chapter 118: The Circle of Life

Roscoe prevented himself from squeaking out a curse as he ordered the retreat of the elite skeletons. The humans had surprised him. Their leader had craftily lured them into trap after trap. If his troops could feel, their morale would be quite low. Luckily, they were either mindless undead or fervent followers of the Void god. This was nothing but a minor setback.

No, Roscoe and his generals already had plans for what to do next. Taking the city would be delayed. It was a failure for their god, but better this small disappointment than a larger one later. A large portion of the horde stayed circling the walls to prevent anyone else from leaving easily. The rest separated into columns and marched in all different directions away from the city.

It was a shame, one that he was only coming to terms with now. Roscoe was starting to accept that he was not some great general who could cleverly outmaneuver his opponents, despite being outnumbered or otherwise at a disadvantage. Sure, he was reasonably clever, but this human commander had been at least one step ahead at each engagement.

This wasn't going to go well for the holy army if they continued to try and engage with these terms. They needed a real, overwhelming advantage. Recruitment drives were the obvious solution. Normally that would involve an aggressive attack, as the fallen troops from any protracted battle or engagement would soon result in their overwhelming advantage. However, this enemy was careful to not lose large numbers and had some way of making sure that some of Roscoe’s own troops were destroyed permanently. No, they would need to go further afield for new recruits.

Roscoe clenched his teeth. This wasn't the disaster that it could have been, but it was not good either. The troops had orders to find additional troops. In the meantime, Roscoe had a skill of his own to experiment with.

With his latest level, he had been offered Necromantic Rituals. From speaking with his skeletal associates, it sounded like the skill was related to the magic that had preserved them and their intelligence. It made sense, though, as he could somehow feel the aura of undeath around in a way that he couldn’t before. With an effort of will, he was even able to manipulate it a tiny bit. Still, Roscoe hadn’t had time to test much more than idle curiosities.

Now though… It bore further investigation. Perhaps that skill could hold the key to his victory.

—

The road stretched long and narrow through the trees. Personally, Bee didn't think it felt that long, but as she jogged next to the panting Tony, he vehemently disagreed.

"What do you mean, ‘it's not that far’?” He gulped in some air. “It took us a week! To come back from Greg! We left the castle! Two hours ago!" Tony was trying to be empathetic, but his inability to breathe really made it hard for him to make his points eloquently.

"Well, last time we made this trip, we were pulling enough weight that an ox might have had trouble. Now you have no burden. There is clearly no reason to complain." Bee admired the stark, mostly-bare trees lining the path as they ran. She knew this wasn't an entirely a good-faith argument, but she was having fun pushing Tony's buttons.

"You. Are. Plenty. Reason. To. Complain." Tony panted out as they started up a slight hill. They halted their conversation until they had crested the top. Even then, it took him a second to catch his breath on the decline. "You have to be twice my level. Are you just trying to push me to my limits? I don't think you’ve even broken a sweat yet."

Bee ran her fingers through her hair. There was some moisture at her roots. It was slight, but she was sweating. "That's just because girls don't sweat. Didn't your mom teach you this?"

Tony just growled and pushed his legs a little harder. Frowning at not getting the reaction she was looking for, Bee continued with her teasing. "Actually, you have some sisters too, so really you have no excuse."

"I've also mucked pig pens with those sisters. I clearly have no delusions about how pretty and perfect you are." Tony shot back with a dirty look. "In fact, I think you have something in your hair, come a little closer, and I can get it out for you." As he spoke, Tony ran his fingers through his soaking mop of hair and flung the drips at Bee. He followed up his attack by reaching out for her as if to give her a big, sweaty hug.

Speeding up a bit, Bee grinned and wiped a few droplets from her face with the back of her hand. "Gross and slow!" She called over her shoulder as she slowly pulled away.

Bee didn't get too far ahead, as she didn't want to get Tony attacked and hurt by getting too far out of reach. But she did want to make him pay for that. A minute or two later, she found a nice patch of grass off to the side of the road. Flopping down, she laid on her back with her arm flung carelessly over her eyes. It didn't take too long before she could hear Tony's panting not too far down the road. Carefully she held still until he got near enough to see. Then she rose and started running by his side again.

With an exaggerated yawn, she stretched her arms above her head. "I thought you would never catch up."

"Sometimes I can't believe how childish you are," Tony shook his head.

Bee paused mid-theatrical stretch. Was she being childish?

"Uhhh, yeah, you are right; we can, uh, slow down if you need to," Bee muttered after a few moments of thinking. Thinking back on it, she hadn't been acting in a way worthy of her master. As the only priestess of their fledgling religion, there was a certain level of decorum that she really should try to adhere to. Running around and playing with her second like he was her brother wasn't in line with that at all.

Tony shook his head and sighed. "I didn't mean it like that. You should still be a kid. You’re what, 12?"

"Almost 14!" Bee protested.

"Still, my point stands. There is way more pressure on you than what it would take to crush most adults. I'm amazed, but at the same time, I don't envy you at all."

Bee grunted neutrally. "I've gotten used to it. Sure, the last few months have been rough. But it didn't feel that much worse than at home.” She paused for a moment. “Honestly, most of it has been so amazing. Void has given me so much freedom and taught me so much. I don't think I could ever go back to the relatively low stress of being a glorified maid in the castle, even if that was one of the easiest times in my life. It was so boring."

"I thought you were an apprentice." Tony raised an eyebrow.

"Technically, I was, but they all spend more time cleaning than doing magic. The mages don't seem to think it's worth their while to do any teaching for the first few years. If you stick around through that, they might notice you exist. Unless your parents pay to expedite the process, of course."

Tony grimaced and wiped the sweat out of his eyebrows. "Yours didn't, I take it?"

"No, I was there because I was already written off. Too impulsive to take on the family afterward and not old enough to marry off yet. If I had stayed for a couple years without running away, I'm sure my father might have found a use for me." Bee said without a hint of bitterness in her voice.

"That seems… wasteful. But then, how do you know so much about magic?" Tony said, his breathing once again ragged.

"Uh, mostly reading books and listening to Void," Bee said. "I didn't really know much before this, and the words they use in magic texts are pretty old. Probably read the dictionary a dozen times that first week."

"Wow, sounds like your dad really messed up. What a waste of talent to set you aside like that.”

"More like a lack of interest. Nothing like the fear of a nebulous god and demons to get you motivated. Besides, father didn't set me aside. It was more like… He put me on a shelf until he had a use for me." Bee said in a half-hearted defense of her father. She didn't really hold too much love for the man, but he was family, right? Her emotions about her father had cooled quite a bit after the chaos of the last few months.

Tony just shook his head and continued running.

—

I had a lot to think about. The dirt had so many things in it that I didn't understand. Little bits of life. Bits of organic material. Particles of inorganic minerals and stone. All the germs and bacteria that I expected, but more than just that. Insects and worms were everywhere. When I studied what they were doing, things started to come together in my understanding.

It started with me following the base components of the grass. Mostly the carbon and nitrogen. I could see it draw some from the soil. But where did that all come from? Each time I found an answer, it just seemed to leave me with a dozen more questions.

When it came down to it, I was pretty sure that without the clippings falling back into the dirt for long enough, the soil would run out of some of the really important minerals. That might take a long time, but if it did, then the grass wouldn't grow, and we would only have dirt. That wasn't good because, well, it would be dirty.

Based off of some simple math, I had a decent amount of time before that became a real issue. I just needed to find a way to process the cuttings I had carefully balled up in my dustbin. I wasn't really sure how to do that, though. I supposed I could just leave them in the grass, but that would block out the sun from hitting plants that needed it - another interesting variable. Plus, leaving debris like this lying around went against my very nature. Better to make the soil enrichment process more efficient and clean.

I kept a few models running on the problem in the background. While I slowly made my way in an ever-widening ring around the castle, I carefully inspected everything with my sensors, looking for the other sources of these nutrient-rich materials. Once I had a supply, I could see about isolating the important bits and finding a good way to inject them back into the soil.

My glowy sword had no problems cutting the grass as I covered the courtyards, and I felt a sense of peace come over me. Not quite like when I was cleaning, but something along those lines. This was something that required slightly more focus than cleaning, as the cuts needed to be perfectly even. Each variation in the ground needed to be accounted for, and the edge of the blade needed to line up so that the cleanest cut was made. My progress was much slower than even if this had been a long carpet. But I didn't mind. This wasn't something that I would do every day since grass didn't grow that fast.

The tall grass hid me for a long while, but the widening ring of evenly cut grass radiating from the castle started to draw attention. Soon enough, I realized that I had a bit of a crowd watching me.