Beers and Beards

Book 2: Chapter 38: The Emerald Lake

The next morning we received a message from Copperpot that our building was “Being Surveilled" by his own Corporate Combat team. And they would “Provide Discrete Security” whenever Annie or I left the building. Which didn’t really help my anxiety.

But that was neither here nor there, because I now had 'get my own freaking gnomish ninja squad' on my bucket list. Maybe I could arrange something with Whistlemop for our partnership.

On that note, I idly wondered if Berry already had her own, or if anyone had bothered to tell her yet. She was getting big enough that it was probably relevant. Then again, I’d been busy immersing myself in dwarven culture, so maybe she had learned about it right away as a gnome. Oh, and I really needed to brush up on my basic dwarven anatomy before I got blindsided with another quirk of biology. Maybe I really should let Annie give me that little talk on the elves and the trees.

With Copperpot on board and his company ready to announce our partnership, that put us right on track for our meeting with the Brewer’s Guild in…. freaking two days. Yeesh!!! We were cutting it close, and if the Mine corporation managed to sabotage us even the slightest, we wouldn’t make it.

Balin padded over with a big yawn. “I’m goin’ ta bed soon, Pete. I need some shuteye. Before I go, I got some more stuff fer ya. We're through Darkwood, and we hit tha Emerald Lake. Nasty place. None of us can swim, so we’re goin’ round it.”

He shivered, and dropped a sack on the ground beside me. “Here’s what I was able ta get. Most of it is still from Darkwood, but I got summa tha fish, plants, and monster parts from tha lake.”

I took the bag and opened it up. Balin had the forethought to individually wrap stuff in oilskin this round, so the bag wasn’t quite as… squelchy as the first time. “Thanks Balin. I’ve been meaning to ask, how do you get back to where you were? I can’t imagine you’re trekking in each time. Is there a [Displacer] on retainer?”

“Naw, Minnova built warp gates at most o’ tha major hubs. Ya’ got to prove you can make it to them before you can use em, though.”

“Like the ones in the capital, that go to the human and elven lands? How do they justify the cost?” I’d learned about those fascinating pieces of transportation during my lessons with Richter. They were incredibly expensive to maintain and use, so they generally only went to the capitals of the various kingdoms. I’d been disappointed to learn that they were so controlled that warp travel was practically banned. Only approved companies or certain noble families could use them. If I wanted to easily bring my beer to the rest of the world, I was going to need to find a way to get that approval. Another problem for later.

“Cost isn’t an issue in tha dungeon. The high ambient mana down there keeps tha gates workin’ on their own,” Balin answered.

“Why doesn’t anyone connect all the dungeons to each other?” I mused.

“Dunno. I’m not an [Artificer].”

I began rifling through the bag. It was once again twigs, mushrooms, leaves, and the occasional organ. In addition, there were a couple slimy fish - one looked like a trout, and the other a trout with legs - some slimy weeds, a fuzzy purple crab, some kelp, and a clear rubbery skin of some kind.

I began flicking my ingredient filters on and off. I’d reduced the number of active items on my Minimap after the attack, and currently only ‘People’ and ‘Gnomish Blood: Ambermine’ were active.

I yawned as I flicked ingredients on and off. I was getting pretty tired myself, and I was going to need to -

I stopped dead as a dot appeared on my minimap right beside me. I immediately whipped my head around looking for gnomish super ninjas then breathed out a sigh of relief as I realized It wasn’t a person - the dot was too small. Then that breath caught in my throat.

“Balin!” I choked. “BALIN!!”

Balin immediately went on high alert, grabbing his shield and axe. “What is it!? I donnae sense anythin’ with [Perceive Ambush]!”

I began throwing organs across the room. “Not that! One of these is isinglass!!!”

Balin lowered his arms. Of both kinds. “Whazzat? None of it’s glass.”

As I tossed the rubbery skin across the room, the dot on my minimap sailed away. I shrieked with joy as I ran to pick it up, which of course caused the entire brewery to descend on our position with weapons at the ready. There was a confused jumble as everyone looked around for the enemy.

“Pete!” “What’s goin on!” “Who you want me kill!?” “Where’s the ambush!” “I don’t see anyone!”

“IT’S FINE, it’s fine!” I waved my hands. “We’re all fine, don’t worry about it. Balin just got me the best present EVAR!” I held the strip of skin aloft for everyone to see. My worries and fears of the previous night were briefly forgotten; I could collect them with interest when I slept, later.

“You think that’s the best present? I need to get you out more, Pete.” Kirk said with a raised eyebrow.

“Godsdamn, I thot we were about ta die.” Richter moaned.

“All worked up and nothin’ to hit.” Johnsson sighed, his tone… polite.

“We could smack you instead?” Zirce and Emma told him in unison.

“So, why all the fuss?" Annie asked. “I can’t imagine it’s just some… whatever that is.”

“It’s isinglass. This stuff is, uh - I’ll tell you later. After I do some research.” I looked around at our audience. Half of them rolled their eyes.

“Aw come on. I want to hear what it does!” Aqua complained. “It’s more interesting now that - “ Her mouth snapped shut, like her lips had been zippered. She made some *mmf* *mrf* noises then stopped talking. “Never mind,” she finished lamely.

For her Titled Milestone Ability she’d chosen [Keep Secrets]. Her reasoning being that nobody was going to trust a gossip with their heart and soul. As a result she was now incapable of accidentally revealing information told to her in confidence, and it would prevent Abilities or ‘methods of coercion’ from doing the same. It was a nearly necessary Ability for any [Counselor], [Hypnotist], or other relationship based Title.

She’d known herself well, given that she’d almost casually revealed my own secret. I gave her a death glare and she wilted, mouthing ‘sorry’.

“I’ll tell everyone later. This stuff is going to help us win the brewing contest.” I held it aloft to snorts of disbelief. “Balin, where did you get this?”

Balin squared his shoulders and began proudly, his tiredness briefly forgotten. “Well, let me tell ya’ all about it. It all started when we got outta Darkwood and first saw tha Emerald Lake…”

—

“Formation four everyone,” Starshine whispered, “and leopard check.” The party spread out quickly, each of the melee fighters - Manny the glass-mantis, Starshine, Balin, and Raysdotter - taking the point of an imaginary four sided diamond. Raydotter shed [Inner Light] from her spot in the center, and Flowerpott stood guarding her with his mace and round shield at the ready.

The steady light stood in contrast to the flickering shadows beneath the dark green lakewater; the algae kept the rays from penetrating more than a centimeter. The edge of the Darkwood stood a mere hundred meters or so away from the shoreline, and Balin kept a wary eye out for any lilyleopards or treants that might be prowling there. He steadied his stance and groaned as his feet sunk into the guck. The ground they stood upon was a horrid mixture of silt, clay, and stink. Bones and bits of shell crunched beneath his steel shod boots, and a tiny multi-clawed purple crab covered in moss skittered over his toes before he shooed it away. It hissed bubbles at him and retreated into the water where it instantly vanished.

Balin shivered. His [Golden Armour] was marred with muck, and water kept seeping into the joints.

“All clear. Formation two.” The party moved into a rough circle and Manny’s insectile body vanished back into the darkness. The golem would patrol around them and check in periodically. Up above them, small glassfly golems spread out over the lake and into the trees.

“Why are we doing this at night??” Flowerpott groaned. “There’s a perfectly nice blue sky up there during the day. I thought we were done with dark now that we were out of Darkwood!”

“All the most valuable monsters are active at night,” Starshine replied. “And we’re uniquely suited to fighting in darkness. We have two stealth capable members, and a mage that can strip hiding based Abilities. We can surprise monsters but they can’t surprise us.”

“And ya’know, all it cost us was several months of bein’ ambushed every damn day!!” Raysdotter chuckled. “So let’s take advantage of what we earned.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. I love my new Ability, but I’m not shure the Milestone was worth it. Really, ambushed ova’ eighty times! I thot I’d lose my maind!” Aishablue complained, her South Erden accent growing stronger as she grew heated.

“It’s why people adventure. You get new Milestones out here faster. That means more Specialisations and more chances to evolve your Abilities. That also means more chances to become rich and famous.”

“And more chances to die.” Flowerpott grimaced.

There was a splash from deeper out in the water where Aishablue’s light didn’t reach.

“I hate this place even more than the Darkwood. It stinks and my glasses keep getting slime on them.” Flowerpott grumbled.

Raysdotter scoffed. “At least you don’t need to get into the water, eh!”

Aishablue frowned. “My [Dangersense] is going off, but it always goes off this close to the lake; I can’t swim. What about [Perceive Ambush]?”

Balin shook his head. When they’d received the “Ambushed!” Milestone he’d chosen that particular Ability. If there was one person you didn’t want getting caught flat-footed, it was the party guardian. “I donnae sense anythin’.”

“Hold on, one of my glassfiles just pinged me. It’s out on the lake. Over… there!” Flowerpott pointed deeper into the placid water. While it was ostensibly a ‘lake’ it was practically a sea. It stretched out nearly as far as Minnova’s cavern, and it would take them at least a week or so to walk around. Boats could be bought near the warp gate, but they were expensive, and traveling over the water was significantly more dangerous; the biggest things were in the middle of the lake.

There was another splash out in the water. Ripples flowed through the algae like it was mud, making squelching sounds as they hit the shore. The crab from earlier ran back onto land, skittering towards the trees before it hid under a rock. A rancid stench followed, carried on a foul wind.

“I’ve a bad feelin’…” Balin muttered.

“[Dangersense] is spiking!” Aishablue whispered.

Starshine stepped forward. “Right, formation five everyone!”

Aishablue immediately began painting a sigil in the air, her wand tracing bright blue lines.

“[Mental Command: Manny], argh! Midna’s Mullet, now you lot have me doing it too!” Flowerpott swore.

“[Encourage: Agility], [Minor Blessing: Move in Aether], [Shadowcloak].” Raysdotter moved away from the group and slunk into the darkness, which embraced her like a well-worn jacket.

Balin set his shield and raised his axe, staring out over the increasingly agitated water of the lake. Their surroundings had lost the constant *pop* *pop* of clams venting air, and the only sound was the discordant thwap of waves on the shore.

“Steady.” Starshine commanded. “Steaaaady.”

Aishablue finished her sigils with a flourish. “Spell’s ready.”

“Wait on Balin.”

Slowly, the ripples died out and the lake returned to its placid, calm state. But after over eighty ambushes, nobody was fooled.

Aishablue held her wand on the sigil, which had begun to shake as she pushed more mana into it. “[Dangersense] is still spiking.”

Starshine spoke without taking her eyes from the water. “Do you see anything with the glassfiles?”

“[Basic Glasseye]... no, just a bunch of weeds.” Flowerpott shook his head.

“AMBUSH!” Balin roared and closed his eyes.

Aishablue unleashed her spell, flooding the space around them with white hot light. She activated her new Ability at the same time. “[REVEALING LIGHT]”

When Balin opened his eyes again, their enemy was revealed. The Ability had stripped away whatever natural or monstrous camouflage it was using, giving it a slight blue aura - like a thin skin of moonlight.

It was a monstrous jellyfish, with tentacles made of squirming kelp. Each tentacle was at least thrice Kirk’s giant height, and it’s bulbous white body was as wide around as a Darkwood tree. A horrific stench wafted from it, like a combination of dead fish and unigoat shit. It burbled, and attacked.

“[Challenge], get over here ya foul beastie!” Balin roared.

Two green tentacles snaked out of the water and grabbed hold of his ankles. Then it heaved.

“AHHH!! NOT LIKE THAT!!” Balin fell onto his back and dug his axe into the silt. He skidded to a stop a mere handspan from the now roiling lake water.

“[Basic Charge]!” Starshine rocketed past him, her [Juggernaut] Abilities granting her great speed even while fully encased in plate mail. She brought her warhammer down on the jellyfish’s body, and clear goo splattered all over her and Balin.

Balin shouted, “Captain! I need ta’ hit it first!!” But the damage was done.

The jellyfish thrashed its tentacles in obvious pain and distress, and four of them wrapped around Starshine as she raised her warhammer up to make another strike. She brought it around in a [Basic Slash], but a green kelpy limb caught the weapon in mid swing.

Then another tentacle pulled her feet out from under her and she disappeared beneath the surface. The jellyfish returned to ignoring her and focused back on Balin, sending three more tentacles his way. He slashed them apart with his axe.

Then, Raysdotters was there, her body slipping through the water like an eel. She drove her spear into the rubbery body, impaling it through. At the exact same moment, Manny appeared in front, and its twin sickles sliced apart the tentacles holding Starshine. With a buzzing of wings, the glass golem jumped back into the darkness.

Starshine tried to rise, but her heavy armour was keeping her down. Balin swore and drove forward into the water. Another swath of green oily tentacles hammered down at him but he met them with his shield and [Basic Block].

“Come on, Captain. Not gonna let ya drown in yer own armour!” As the Jellyfish focused on the long shaft of wood driven through its core, Balin lifted an arm under his fallen leader. She rose out of the muck sputtering and hacking, every inch of her stained the same emerald green as the lake.

“I hate this place.” She grumbled, then smashed her warhammer onto the jellyfish once more. It shuddered, then died.

—

“So, what was it?” Aqua asked.

“Somethin’ called a Corpsejelly. They mostly eat dead bodies, but if they get real hungry they’ll attack stuff on the shore.”

“And Pete wants to put it in the beer!?” Johnsson gasped, aghast.

I hugged the sheath of rubber close. But not too close. “I’ll…. ask Jeremiah to check it with his Ability and talk to Alchemist Black. People eat disgusting things all the time. Have you ever thought about where goat’s milk or eggs actually come from?? And have you seen those pickled kippers that Balin and Jeremiah eat!?”

There was general assent to Balin’s protest.

Pickled kippers were definitely more foul than the rubbery flesh of a jellyfish corpse monster.