Humanity Protection Company

TL/Editor: raei

Status: 5/week mon-fri

Illustrations: posted in discord

Join the discord! Here

'Abolished? Anomaly Qualification Exam? Just like that?'

Yeonwoo's face went blank for a moment before all emotion drained from it. He was on the verge of losing a important resource, one he'd already lost once before.

There was no room for leisure or emotion. Yeonwoo made the most rational decision he could with a cold mind.

"Wait! Don't go yet, let's talk for a bit! You know I can keep summoning you anyway, so isn't it better to settle this now?"

He straightened his posture respectfully and reached for his phone.

A small sigh and some static came through the phone. The voice that followed sounded reluctant, as if it had no choice but to listen - like it had a gun to its head.

Yeonwoo licked his dry lips and spoke carefully.

"I apologize for my harsh words earlier. I was upset. If I offended you, I'm sorry, but can't we negotiate?"

They might be able to reopen the abolished Human Qualification Exam. Even if a Level 6 certificate was too much, he could still get a regular one.

Yeonwoo drastically lowered his demands.

"Just give me back the certificate. It's not that difficult, is it? You didn't even tell me why it was cancelled. Think of this as an appeal."

"The reason for cancellation..."

The voice trailed off, as if struggling to be honest. Whatever the reason, telling a Level 6 fixated on the Human Qualification Certificate could lead to a terrible future.

In the end, the voice through the speaker equivocated.

"We cannot disclose the reason for cancellation as per regulations. Please understand. Also, according to regulations, we cannot reissue a cancelled certificate, and an abolished exam will not be reopened."

There was no going back to the Human Qualification Exam. They couldn't issue Human Qualification Certificates either. Its fundamental nature had changed. It was like a mosquito turning into a fly.

Yeonwoo, the source of this pressure, wore a frustrated expression as he tapped the table with his computer pen.

For a moment, a cold light flashed in his eyes.

'I can't just change those regulations with the dice. It might fail, and even if it succeeds, they could just change them back.'

Yeonwoo let out a groan. This was truly a difficult opponent. Blackmail? They just abolished themselves. There didn't seem to be any openings for the dice to exploit.

Finally, Yeonwoo decided to appeal to emotions. He clutched the phone with both hands.

"Come on. The certificate is important to me. It was the first anomaly I encountered, and the reason I, a long-time student, joined the company."

His voice was filled with desperation, like someone who had lost a precious keepsake or memory.

An uncomfortable silence followed through the speaker, and suddenly Yeonwoo realized something.

'Wait a second. This thing is the reason I've been living such a twisted life, isn't it?'

If it weren't for the Human Qualification Exam, he would have passed the civil service exam and lived a normal life. Of course, he would have died in the climate anomalies, so this was better, but Yeonwoo decided to argue this point. ɽ

Yeonwoo's brow furrowed. He pressed the phone's microphone close to his mouth and burst out with a voice filled with intentional anger.

"It's because of you that I'm living this messed-up life! You made me like this! You ruined my life!"

"We sincerely apologize."

The static-filled voice responded immediately.

"We are sorry for any unintended inconvenience caused by the Human Qualification Exam. The abolition of the Human Qualification Exam was part of our apology for the accident you experienced. The new Anomaly Qualification Exam will take these mistakes into account and strive to prevent similar inconveniences. We would like to apologize once again."

We are sorry.

The voice flowed smoothly without pause.

If not for the static, it could have passed for a public apology with how flawless it was.

Apology, act of atonement, preventive measures, no excuses.

Yeonwoo gaped, a defeated look on his face. He could nitpick if he wanted, but judging by that response, it seemed they absolutely wouldn't give him the certificate.

'No way. No, no, seriously. No.'

It would have been easier if they had threatened him or tried to run away or fight. Trying to persuade them with words seemed utterly impossible.

'I really can't do this with words.'

Yeonwoo swallowed hard. The only option left was to circle back to threats. He gripped the pen like a dagger.

"The company's destruction plans. Rolling the dice on the possibility of you not existing. Please, while I'm asking nicely-"

"Attention all examinees. We hereby announce that the Anomaly Qualification Exam may be permanently abolished due to external reasons-"

"Stop! Stop talking!"

Yeonwoo screamed, throwing the pen. It fell limply.

He said he'd kill them if they wanted to die, what more could he do?

'This is driving me crazy.'

In the end, Yeonwoo gave up on extracting the certificate. There was no way. He'd never faced an opponent like this before and had no idea how to deal with it.

The static from the speaker gradually faded. It seemed to be quietly slipping away.

Yeonwoo spoke weakly.

"At least let me take the Anomaly Qualification Exam."

He clung to this last hope, wondering if failing it might have an effect similar to the Human Qualification Certificate.

Ding dong dang dong-

A cheerful chime rang out from the phone speaker. The voice, sounding relieved, spoke in a higher tone.

"The exam will begin in 10 minutes."

Yeonwoo gathered up the computer pen he had thrown. He let out a deep sigh, his mind in turmoil. He simply clasped his hands together and prayed.

'I hope failing has the same effect as the Human Qualification Certificate.'

------

Silence fell over the small room. Yeonwoo quietly looked down at the A4 paper. Several short-answer questions were printed on it.

Under the title [Anomaly Qualification Exam] written in large letters, the questions were lined up.

1. What is 1 + 1?

2. Are you an anomaly or a person?

3. What comes after A, B, C, D?

4. Is the Earth flat or round?

Yeonwoo skimmed through the questions without tension. There was no danger anyway. His mindset and purpose were completely different from when he first took the Human Qualification Exam.

'To fail, I just need to get a low score, right?'

For an exam, you need a high score to pass.

Aiming to fail, Yeonwoo lazily scribbled with the computer pen. The questions were so easy that it was simple to aim for wrong answers.

1 + 1 is 3. After A, B, C, D comes 'mwak', the Earth is triangular.

He finished in an instant. For the question asking if he was an anomaly or a person, he hesitated briefly but guessed that 'person' would be the wrong answer for an Anomaly Qualification Exam and wrote 'person'.

I am a person.

After writing that final answer, Yeonwoo waved the exam paper.

"I'm done. Grade it quickly."

This exam couldn't apply strict rules. The exam paper vanished in an instant, and a few seconds later, a certificate was spat out of thin air.

At that moment.

Yeonwoo's pupils dilated. The dice stirred. The contamination of the dice, which had been suppressed by survival instinct and couldn't even dream of spreading, arose.

"Huh? What?"

Yeonwoo, doubting reality, hurriedly opened the certificate. There was Yeonwoo's ID photo and a short line of text below it.

- This certifies that the above entity is an anomaly.

"No, why? I got everything wrong!"

No, that wasn't the real problem. The real issue was the contamination of the dice itself.

Just as the survival instinct and Human Qualification Certificate had resisted the dice's rampage when invaded by the mist, now the dice and Anomaly Qualification Certificate were resisting the survival instinct that blocked contamination.

At this rate, the dice and Anomaly Qualification Certificate seemed poised to push back the survival instinct.

'If I leave this alone, I'll lose my sense of self, won't I?'

Yeonwoo jumped to his feet. He wildly waved the Anomaly Qualification Certificate he held in one hand.

"Cancel! Cancel! No, I'm returning it! Quickly!"

"...We accept the examinee's request. The exam has ended."

A voice that sounded exhausted came through, and the Anomaly Qualification Certificate vanished with a whoosh. Then, without another word, the connection was abruptly cut off.

The static from the phone speaker disappeared. It had fled before he could stop it.

"It's gone? Really? This can't end like this!"

Yeonwoo slumped down.

"No, ah..."

Everything had gone wrong. It was a complete failure. The lost Human Qualification Certificate hadn't returned.

In the silent room.

After sitting dejectedly for a while, Yeonwoo suddenly brightened as he recalled what had just happened.

"That's right. I made a mistake."

He had approached this wrong from the start. Of course he got the wrong answer when he hadn't asked the right question.

The path of survival is often a lonely one. Relying on an anomaly like an exam was a mistake to begin with. If you need a resource, you should obtain or create it with your own power.

Yeonwoo crawled around, rummaging through his odds and ends. He picked up an ID photo, took out some A4 paper, found some glue, and placed them all next to the computer pen.

Yeonwoo carefully crafted a certificate.

'I shouldn't rely on someone else's guarantee.'

As he'd experienced today, it could suddenly be cancelled on someone else's whim, he might be asked for something in return, or he could face dangerous situations due to interference.

It was better to make it himself.

Splat, the ID photo, covered in glue, stuck crookedly to the A4 paper. Yeonwoo wrote below it.

[Human Qualification Certificate]

- Name: Lee Yeonwoo

- I guarantee and certify that I am human.

- Valid until: Until I die.

Now only the final preparation remained.

Yeonwoo comfortably spread his hands on the table and closed his eyes. He muttered to himself.

"This needs to become an anomaly. It helps with survival, right? It protects against contamination, and I definitely need the dice. Look at today. I just got something taken away and that was it.

I need to block contamination with the certificate and level up the dice to 6 to flexibly handle various situations."

He stimulated his survival instinct to work and then:

"Dice. You too. You need to reach Level 6. How long are we gonna live like this? Let's roll a critical success. Let's make something like those mealworm heads or that eraser from before."

He tried to persuade the dice.

He knew that Level 6 couldn't be achieved just because you wanted it. But he could create something close to Level 6, like the mealworm heads.

He didn't know if these words had any effect, but Yeonwoo muttered to himself as if giving himself a suggestion.

Then he clenched his fist tightly.

"The possibility that this is my Human Qualification Certificate."

Clatter-

The dice rolled. Amidst the chaotically shaking possibilities, the survival instinct avoided futures where failure and critical failure would happen. The suppressed dice stretched, as if pushing away the bang.

Possibility writhed between success and critical success.

Finally, Yeonwoo mindlessly made a fist-clenching gesture and-

Critical success!

The result came out.

The clumsy piece of paper Yeonwoo had made became his very own Human Qualification Certificate. Moreover, it was a certificate that exerted tremendous power in protecting his sense of self and maintaining his humanity.

Yeonwoo smiled contentedly.

'With this, no matter what that exam says, no matter what anyone says, I'm human anyway.'

---