Industrial Strength Magic

Chapter 48: Bureaucracy

Solaris was sitting at his desk, enjoying a moment to catch his breath between public speaking and flesh-eating monsters.

You’d think I’d get over my fear of public speaking before the fear of flesh-eating monsters, He thought.

“Sir!” Harry Spills, one of his I.A. folk, came rushing in with a manilla folder.

Please let this be good news.

“Good news!”

Solaris relaxed in his chair. “Whaddya got?”

“I found this kid who’s been passed up for an exam of his powers eleven times.” He said, opening up the folder and placing it directly in front of him.”

“Jetset. Power of flight.” Solaris muttered. “What’s so special about this?”

“He has perfect control, and no external forces acting on him, he simply moves in the direction he wants. Sound familiar?”

It did.

“And get this, he applied for another screening last month, claiming he was able to somehow lethally shove one of the fire-wasps with his power. He was denied again.”

“Who’s his case worker?”

“Joshua Able. I did some digging and found a connection between Mr. Able and Jetset’s father. It seems like there’s some bad blood there.”

“You see, this is one of the reasons I tell people not to investigate a super’s family.” Solaris smacked the page with the back of his hand for emphasis.

“Next time I see Mr. Able, he better be picking up garbage with his hands or unclogging toilets.”

“Yes Sir.”

“Alright, nice find. Give yourself a bonus, I gotta make some phone calls.”

“Sir,” Harry nodded and left the room.

Solaris turned on his computer and entered the database, entering Jetset, and bringing up his data.

How many others have slipped through the cracks? He thought, curiosity getting the better of him as he opened up Jetset’s team.

Titan showed good capability as a small team leader, but his power would never make him a sweeper.

Warcry was intriguing, but her inability to pierce prawn hide was a problem. She’s still got a decade before her powers are set in stone, Solaris thought, flagging her file for attention.

Most powers stopped growing in power and flexibility in the late twenties, when the brain stopped developing.

With practice, she might be able to grow her strength, overcome that limitation, and he could have another sweeper.

Hardcase was your typical bargain basement Tinker. Nothing particularly special about her. Showed good talent at making mech-suits. It remained to be seen if she could make tech stable enough to operate without her presence in High Tide.

Manic needed a stricter diet and exercise plan to maximize the efficiency he performed at. Unfortunately the young man had a poorly operating frontal lobe, as he tended to get himself in more trouble than he was worth.

One can only hope he grows out of it.

Solaris picked up his phone and dialed Recruitment.

“Hey, can you guys make an offer to one energy type named ‘Warcry?’ I want to see if you can train her output high enough to pierce prawn hide. Could be sweeper potential there.”

“And let’s offer Titan an officer rank. Kid’s solid, and he might not let go of Warcry without some compensation.”

The people on the other end agreed quickly, and Solaris hung up.

Now the hard call.

He dialed up Mass-Driver.

The other side rang for only a second before the cowl picked up the line.

“Hey, boss-man, what did you need? Another sweeper on the wall? I’m always happy to do it.”

“If by happy, you mean charging me through the nose.” Solaris said, rolling his eyes.

“Well, not too many people know how desperate you actually are.”

“No, I got an interesting file on my desk, kid named Jetset. He reminds me of you when you were his age. Perfect flight, inexplicably blasted something touching him in a life-or-death situation.”

“Interesting. I suppose you telling me about him implies if he dies, you’ll come after me first.”

“Yup. Here’s what I want you to do. I want you to bump into this kid and his team a few times. Throw him some softballs, see if he’s got what you got. Wring it out of him if you have to.”

“You’d love to have a ‘me’ on your team, wouldn’t you?” Mass-Driver asked.

“How much do you want?” Solaris asked, ignoring Mass-Driver.

“Well, money ain’t exactly been a problem these days, chief. I tell you what we could use. If Nexus were to forget South block twelve were to exist for a night…”

The mutant slums. Solaris rubbed his temples.

“I have to ask, is what you’re planning going to destabilize Franklin City?”

“Nope.”

“Does it involve anything abhorrent, such as the trafficking of women and children? Mass-murder?”

“Nope. Just a good old-fashioned territorial dispute.”

“If both parties agree to evacuate the civilians beforehand, Nexus will overlook it.”

“Of course. We’re all civilized gangsters here.”

“I highly doubt it,” Solaris said.

Once the details were hashed out, Solaris asked Farscry to keep an eye on the tussle…unofficially.

He didn’t want them trying to pull a fast one.

***Perry***

Perry was picking at his rice and cheese when Heather spoke up.

“So Perry had an interesting day today. He stood out in the middle of traffic for about half an hour, and then walked six blocks back to his motel-“

“Where he works,” Brendon added helpfully. “He doesn’t own it.”

“Completely naked.” Heather finished.

“I mean, I wasn’t trying to get naked. That part wasn’t my fault.”

“I’m more concerned about the part where you didn’t seem to care.” Heather said.

“Why should I care?” Perry asked. it wasn’t like he lost anything or was any more or less vulnerable than if he was wearing clothes. It literally meant nothing.

Heather motioned to him, glancing meaningfully at his mom.

“Perry, did you stand in the street for half an hour?” Mom asked.

“That’s out of context. I wasn’t just standing there in a fugue state. I was wearing protection, and that’s where I needed to be to send the bouquet of roses to my most hated enemy.” Perry said. “It was all on the up and up.”

Mom stood and walked around the table and seized Perry’s head, peering into his eyes as she turned it this way and that.

“The cracks in your soul are getting bigger. You’re developing the mental illness you’re most prone to. In this case it appears to be psychopathy. You need to start taking your grandmother’s recommendations more seriously.”

“I’ll get right on that,” Perry said, oozing sarcasm

“You’ve missed out on three dinners since then.”

“Out of fifteen.”

“You’re going to be here for every. Single. One,” Mom said, her fingers tightening around the sides of his head. Perry saw literal lightning flash behind her eyes.

“Okay.” Perry didn’t see a reason to unleash that lightning.

“Good.” Mom went and sat back down.

“It’s all about friends and family kid.” Dad said. “People in our line of work tend to go a little crazy if they don’t have friends and family to keep them grounded. And that’s not just an anecdotal, it’s actual research.”

Dad’s thousand-yard stare returned.

“Sometimes a lot crazy.”

“Uh,” Perry grunted around a spoonful of cheesy rice, his eyes reading his status.

Paradox Zauberer (Perry Z.)

Class: Garage Tinker

Level 4

HP: 5

Body: 4

Stability: 4

Nerve: 8

Attunement: 23

Free Points:

XP to next level 2421

Current Quest: Go Steady with Chemestro and Make it Official

Reward: (100XP)

Attunement of 23 = 3.07 times base.

Stability of 4 = 1.21 times base.

Attunement = roughly 2.5 X Stability.

Attunement to Stability ratio @ 2.5 hypothesized to result in the emergence of minor mental illness due to soul damage.

Family bonds and regular group gatherings repair and maintain the soul, which seems to be related to base Stability. But in my case, don’t family gatherings simply maintain base Stability? Perry already ate dinner with his family and had friends who spent time with him regularly, even before dad’s System. Implying that unless he got a lover, the only way for his Stability to go was down.

At the rate Attunement was outpacing Stability, next level he would be at a ratio of…

4.76/1.276 =3.73

3.73/2.53= 1.47

In other words, should he dump his next level entirely into Attunement again, the disparity between his Attunement and his Stability would worsen by 47%, which was a very big number.

And should that result in worsened psychopathy, it would mean he was less likely to have regular family time, causing his base stability to suffer, spiralling further.

If he was currently sitting at mild psychopathy, a 47% nudge would have serious consequences.

If Perry’s hypothesis was correct.

I don’t know, though, it is pretty nice, not caring about what other people think. Perry could vaguely remember how mortified he would be a couple months ago if he’d been forced to walk home naked.

Why is feeling like that a good thing?I don’t get it.

Still, extreme psychopathy didn’t sound like a fun time for anyone either. Perry didn’t want to be a brick of ice, and being an emotionless psycho could cause him serious problems in the long term.

What would be the point of having the confidence to pursue a girlfriend, if he also didn’t care?

I’ll have to study this.

The first thing that Perry had to do was confirm his suspicions of the relationship between Stability, Attunement and soul damage resulting in the manifestation of mental illness.

Which meant he needed some college level books on psychopathy, a large variety of standardized tests to figure out exactly where he was on the spectrum, and…

And Gramma present when I raise Attunement and Stability, respectively. Perry shuddered. Gramma. That’s gonna suck.

Well, she is my doctor.

If Perry’s hypothesis was correct, he’d stumbled across the first soft cap on his exponential curve in Attunement growth.

If astronomical amounts of Attunement rendered him a drooling vegetable with a shattered soul, then it couldn’t really be said to be useful, could it?

“Perry!”

“Uh?” Perry grunted, the Status screen flicking off as he glanced at Heather.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Heather asked.

“We’re going on a date.”

“OOooOOooOO.” Brendon hooted, with Dad joining in.

“That’s fantastic!” Mom said, clasping her hands together with a big grin.

“Oh?” Heather cocked a brow. “Where are we going?”

“Nexus,” Perry said, scooping up another bite of cheese rice.

The was a metallic clatter as Dad dropped his spoon.

“Son, that bureaucratic hellhole was the most unromantic location you could have possibly chosen,” Dad said.

***The next day***

I’M WITH STUPID à

“I think those shirts get worse every time I see them,” Heather said, shaking her head.

“I’m totally gonna stand right next to Chemestro when we sign the paperwork,” Perry said, patting his dumb T-shirt eagerly. “The ultimate revenge.”

They were standing outside of Nexus, a huge building made of matte black steel that could stand up to the worst Franklin City could throw at it.

Created and maintained by the most powerful tinkers of their time, Nexus was a spire of black metal that stretched into the sky, visible from every point in the city.

It was so tall, it was said, that the upper floors were pressurized against the vacuum of space.

It was so wide at the base that several stadiums could fit inside it.

In short, it was big.

Perry, Hardcase and Heather were loitering outside one of the many public entrances, sitting beside a fountain as they waited for the fourth member of their little group date to arrive.

At exactly three PM, Chemestro swooped down from above, dressed in full hyperweave.

I suppose I can’t blame him for that one. It would be pretty stupid to ambush someone right outside Nexus’s front door, but still.

“Alright, we’re all here.”

“Why are they here?” Chemestro asked, glancing at Wraith and Hardcase, who were in their civvies save for domino masks.

“We’re registering as a special group so we can work together on the wall. Way more fun that way. There’s actually no limit to the number of groups you can be registered in.”

“More…fun. On the wall.” Chemestro said, rolling the words around in his mouth like he tasted something funky.

His eyes were also sunken, like he hadn’t gotten very good sleep.

I almost feel sorry for this guy…almost.

“Alright, we’re all here, let’s get this taken care of.”

Together they marched into the massive entrance into Registration, and came to a complete halt at what they saw.

“Wow, I was expecting it to be much worse.” Heather muttered to herself.

The receptionists outnumbered registering teams and supers at least three-to-one.

“They can’t afford to let supers slip through the cracks,” Chemestro muttered, brushing past them. “Especially not during High tide. It would be stupid to have the bare minimum amount of receptionists, potentially causing supers to turn away rather than wait in line.”

Perry’s nemesis let out a huge yawn before flagging down a receptionist, who power-walked over to them with a couple of her co-workers.

“What can we do for you today?” the woman said. All three of the ladies were scanning Chemestro from top to bottom, seemingly impressed.

Dang it.

“Him and I are nemeses,” Chemestro said, pointing at Perry, who made sure to stand just to the left of Chemestro. “We want to make it official.”

“And we’re registering as a team for the wall,” Heather said, motioning to Perry and Hardcase.”

“Alright, you two follow me and Brenda, and you two follow Anne, there.” The lead receptionist said, dividing them up into two groups before leading Perry and Chemestro to an isolated hallway, where they split Perry and his nemesis apart. Perry got Brenda.

She led Perry into a separate room with heavy steel walls, and sat him down in a comfy chair, slapping a stack of papers in front of him nearly an inch thick.

Oh, damn.

“I know it seems like a lot, but I’ll break it down for you.” Brenda said, taking the stack of papers apart, layer by paperclipped layer.

“Here’s the Nemesis form,” She pointed at one spot stack. “This is just a statement of intent to battle each other regularly. Over here, we’ve got the liability volunteer paperwork.”

Liability volunteer paperwork?

“It’s an agreement to serve a certain number of volunteer hours, paying back Nexus for the investment of resources to manage your Nemesis. It also limits your liability, should you murder your nemesis, based on the value you have provided Nexus through your service.”

Perry blinked.

“Here’s a waiver that says you do not hold Nexus Liable in the event that your Nemesis kills you, and that any property you own will become Nexus owned, to soften the loss of your passing.”

Oh, dear Lord, what have I gotten into?

“This part is the team registry,” she said.

“Here’s another waiver that says you will not hold Nexus responsible should you be injured or killed by someone on your team.”

“This is a simple health form, it gets fed into our software and allows us to avoid sending your team somewhere disadvantageous for you.”

Perry scrolled through the health form, his brows rising at the stunning variety of the question.

Blood pressure

Allergies

Previous surgeries

Animal body parts?

Gills or alternate breathing ability?

Cybernetic enhancements

Nannites?

….

Noble blood?

Virginity

Magical enhancements?

Ability/weakness relating to the phase of the moon?

The sensation that nothing exists beyond your immediate vicinity?

I’m gonna have to fudge this form a bit, Perry thought to himself, resolving to lie about the sensation. That didn’t seem like a health thing so much as a red-flag catcher.

I’ll put maybe on the nannites, magical enhancement, and ‘yes’ on noble blood and virginity, Perry thought scrolling down the list at a blistering pace. There were at least half a dozen other groups he fell into, but they were more mundane, such as being male, and Caucasian.

Probably means they’ll avoid sending me after evil witches that bath in noble virgin blood to enhance their powers…if that’s actually a thing.

Unfortunately Brenda wasn’t quite done yet.

“This is a form where you verify that you’ve read and understood the Nexus Privacy Policy…”

Kill me now.