Maybe a Fake Gintama

Chapter 513: Valentine's Day Arc—Conclusion

"First step, chop the chocolate into pieces to melt it..." Tsukuyo, wearing an apron and a headband, stood before the kitchen stove, mumbling to herself while consulting a book titled "Essential Valentine's Day Guide for Girls—Chocolate Edition."

Various ingredients, such as blocks of dark chocolate, milk, sugar, eggs, and cream, were arrayed on the cutting board in front of her.

The stove was on, with a small iron pot filled with boiling water; nearby lay molds, a strainer, and a whisk, among other tools.

"Tsukki, need any help?"

Hinowa opened the kitchen door, slowly wheeling in her electric wheelchair.

"What? No, no need!" Tsukuyo quickly turned around, hiding the book behind her, and hastily explained, "I was just a bit hungry and thought I'd cook some ramen! It's not about making Valentine's chocolates or anything!"

"Is that so... If that's the case, it seems you don't need any help then." Hinowa smiled and began to turn her wheelchair to leave but paused at the door as if remembering something. She turned back with a smile to offer a last piece of advice.

"By the way, that book that looks like a ramen tutorial behind you seems to have caught fire from the stove. I think it might be a good idea to put it out quickly."

Hinowa controlled her wheelchair to leave the kitchen, gently closing the door behind her.

Left alone in the kitchen, Tsukuyo looked at the book in her hands, which was now burned down to a corner. She opened the tap and put the burning book under the running water without a second thought.

The book's fire was extinguished, but the soaked remains were now a pulpy mess.

Looking at the remnants of the book, now unreadable, Tsukuyo silently threw it into the trash can and cleared her throat, trying to reassure herself:

"Cough, cough, it's okay! It doesn't matter at all! All the ingredients are ready! It's straightforward! The chocolate is pre-made; you just need to figure out how to mix these ingredients!"

With that, Tsukuyo's sleeve flashed a hint of steel, and a kunai appeared in her right hand.

"First step... chop!"

After a flurry of activity, the kunai cut the chocolate into tiny pieces along with the cutting board.

"Next, melt!" Saying this, Tsukuyo threw the chocolate and the bits of the cutting board into the boiling pot.

"Then, mix!"

Tsukuyo dumped almost everything on the stove into the boiling pot, including the seasonings and ingredients.

Wiping sweat from her brow, Tsukuyo looked at what was essentially a hotpot before her and smiled easily. "It's surprisingly simple, much like making a hotpot."

"Now, the next step is to shape it."

Tsukuyo bent down to look for the molds she had prepared earlier, only to realize she had tossed them into the pot earlier.

"Well, this just makes it even more convenient."

Muttering to herself, Tsukuyo turned off the stove, used a towel to handle the hot pot, and placed it in the freezer.

After all was done, she nodded to herself, saying, "Then... just wait for it to cool down."

Half an hour later...

Looking at the frozen block of chocolate and various ingredients solidified in the iron pot, Tsukuyo fell silent again.

"Why... the steps were all correct, but why does the result look so different from theirs?" Tsukuyo pondered, smoking her kiseru.

After a long thought, an idea struck her.

"That's right! I must have used too much water!"

Convinced she had made no mistakes, Tsukuyo began another attempt with only half a pot of water this time.

An hour later...

Looking at the pot with slightly less watery ice than before, Tsukuyo smiled easily, "Really, I'm such a fool; chocolate shouldn't have water added! That recipe was wrong from the start! Good thing it got burned."

So, on her third attempt, Tsukuyo didn't add a drop of water, placing the pot directly on the stove and adding the dark chocolate.

This time, it started well, with the chocolate melting quickly in the pot.

Seeing the melting chocolate, Tsukuyo's face brightened. She quickly cracked in some eggs, added cream, poured a generous amount of sugar, and finally added half a milk box.

"This time, it must succeed!"

Tsukuyo turned off the stove, stirred the ingredients thoroughly, and placed the pot back in the fridge to chill.

Half an hour later...

"Success! Now, you just need to cut it into the desired shapes with a kunai!" Tsukuyo exclaimed upon seeing the chocolate in the pot.

However, as she was about to cut the chocolate, she hesitated and carefully broke off a piece to taste test.

"Blah!" Experiencing the full spectrum of life's flavors, Tsukuyo spat out the chocolate, "So bad..."

"But..." Looking at the chocolate-covered iron pot, Tsukuyo muttered, "If it solidified correctly, my steps were correct; it's just a matter of seasoning..."

Thus, Tsukuyo began making her chocolate once again.

[It seems she hasn't considered whether it can be given away...] Hinowa, peeping through the kitchen door, smiled helplessly, thinking, [And actually, she made a mistake from the first step. The proper way is to place the chocolate in a container, then place the container in gently boiling water, making sure not to let the water get into the container, and let the chocolate melt gradually through the heat of the water. But well, Tsukuyo's method is right too... Compared to putting melted chocolate into the mold and letting it solidify, she is more accustomed to using kunai...]

With that thought, Hinowa gently closed the door and quietly wheeled away.

...

After several hours of effort at the dango shop, Tsukuyo finally made some edible chocolate. She cut it into heart shapes using her kunai.

After packaging it, Tsukuyo remembered the most crucial question.

Who... should she give it to?

...

Later, kneeling at the dinner table just like during breakfast, Tsukuyo hesitated before Hinowa softly said, "Tsukki, there are only four hours left until midnight. If there's something you must do today, go ahead."

"The patrol is all set!" Tsukuyo quickly replied.

"No, I'm not talking about that. But... never mind..." Hinowa turned to her son, "Seita, please push me out."

"Okay..."

...

At eleven o'clock at night, having finally decided, Tsukuyo stood at Kawaki's door, hesitating for half an hour before pushing the door open and stepping inside.

"Oh, Tsukki, what is it?" Kawaki, still suffering from too much chocolate, lay weakly on the table.

"Ah, it's nothing," Tsukuyo replied lightly.

"If it's nothing, let me rest a bit. My stomach hurts from all that chocolate... it's so painful..." Kawaki sighed.

"Oh... yes..." After responding twice, Tsukuyo turned and walked towards the door, regretting inwardly: Why did I just leave like that? What was I here for?

"Wait..."

"What... what is it?" Tsukuyo turned back, trying to maintain a composed face.

"Bring it here." Kawaki extended his hand casually.

"What?"

"The chocolate."

"Huh? Why should I give you chocolate!" Tsukuyo exclaimed.

"You didn't prepare any?" Kawaki was surprised, "I thought I'd get some as a thanks. Don't they always call me the savior of Yoshiwara? Well, never mind. No chocolate, then. Goodnight."

Just as Kawaki finished speaking, a heart-shaped chocolate landed on his table.

Kawaki stared at the chocolate next to him in surprise, then looked up towards the door to say something but found the door closed and Tsukuyo seemingly gone.

"Valentine's Day this year..." Kawaki unwrapped the chocolate, glanced at the clock on the wall about to strike midnight, and took a big bite, "...has perfectly ended. But then again, this chocolate... tastes awful..."

Outside, Tsukuyo leaned against the wall, listening to the sounds of Kawaki chewing the chocolate inside, and gently curled her lips upwards.