Tales From the Terran Republic

In a fallow field near a sparkling clear lake, a small, smartly dressed Threen stepped out of a massive ship the size of an oil tanker.

Awaiting him was a much larger Threen, similarly dressed.

They gave each other a hug.

“Brother,” the larger one said, “I thought you were going to contact me the moment you landed.”

“I had a few preparations to make,” Evoron smiled pleasantly.

“I know that smile,” Gravoon chuckled. I also know that I do not wish to inquire further.”

“That is what I value in you most,” Evoron replied, “You are far less stupid than you look.”

“Ha!” his brother exclaimed, “For both our sakes, let’s hope that is correct… and that you are even more evil than your reputation.”

“I think I have that more than covered, dear brother,” Evoron chuckled darkly.

Gravoon made a point not to examine the trodden and rutted field any more closely than he already had. Evoron wasn’t the only person who debarked from that titanic ship.

“Is that one of these ‘ore carriers’ of which you spoke?”

“Yes, it is,” Evoron replied, “magnificent, isn’t it.”

“Truly,” his brother said. “And you say that you can hire more of these?”

“Many more,” Evoron smiled, “They do not come cheap. They will, in fact, cut deeply into our profits. But they will make those profits possible. Ships like these with veteran crews used to and, more importantly, comfortable with risk are a rarity at any price. The Z’uush have indicated that they will be more than willing to haul our cargos anywhere… for the price we have discussed. They are cash starved and willing to deal with us.”

“Cash starved?” his brother asked.

“Yes,” Evoron replied. “While the Terran liberation of their system was enough for many. It was not for all. Many still wish to take their home system, and war requires funds, funds which we can provide. They are already used to dealing with the criminal element for funding and supplies and are very willing to do it again.”

“How is that titan able to land? Would it not break apart?”

“If it were a normal vessel, you would be correct,” Evoron replied, “But these were built to be stuffed full of mineral ores. They have very thick hulls and are reinforced far beyond what is typical of a ship this size. As such, they are doubly valuable, trebly so. They do not need spaceports, and the crew are used to undertaking landings such as these. I was very fortunate to be placed in contact with them.”

“And how was that?” Gravoon asked.

“Um…”

“Was it… her?”

“As a matter of fact, it was,” Evoron bristled. “What of it?”

“Nothing,” Gravoon grinned, “I was just curious, that’s all. May I have the honor of being first of your nuptual crew?”

“Bite me,” Evoron growled, much to his brother’s delight.

“Come, brother,” Gravoon said, “Your room awaits. You should rest before the meet tomorrow.”

“My room?” Evoron asked with a smile, “Am I allowed once more into my childhood home?”

“Father is making an exception just this once,” Gravoon replied, “I think he wishes to keep an eye on you.”

“Well, I did get my intelligence from somewhere and it wasn’t Mother, dear soul that she is. It was from her that I got my loving and kind nature.”

“HA! Come on, we have quite the feast laid out. We even have glazed da’ka, your favorite.”

***

In what was once the shining jewel of the Holy Empire, the royal and holy city of Thexa, there stood a massive and beautiful cathedral. Once the seat of the Church of the Sun, it was crafted as a single magnificent prayer to the lord of lords, the sun.

Each stone was carved, each pillar engraved, each window crafted of stained glass, the art for which the Threen should be known.

It was once the true seat of power for almost all of the planet, a center of religious power, and a beacon of both theological and secular enlightenment. From here a near planet spanning empire was fairly and justly ruled, accomplishment rare in the galaxy, even rarer from a theocracy…

All to be torn asunder by first contact. Their god was just a ball of hot gas and they were not first among its creations.

Their religion died that day, and the empire that it supported? Gone to be replaced by the “just and fair” Federation instead.

But, the cathedral still stood as beautiful as ever. It even served as the true seat of power… so to speak.

The following morning, the true lords of the Threen, the heads of the various criminal gangs and cartels that presided over the homeworld, sat around an open circle at curved tables in that same cathedral.

“What is this about, boss?” Kalshoo, the head of the Kalsh Balo, one of the more prominent cartels.

“Patience, Kalshoo,” the Overboss chuckled. “I promise this meet will be most entertaining.”

“Well, that’s ominous,” Cablaat, ganglord of the Dagra Blades, said. “Should any of us be concerned?”

“Considering our guest, I think it’s too late for that.”

“Oh?” Cablaat asked. “And just who would that be?”

The Overboss said nothing. He simply pressed a button on the raised desk at which he sat.

The assembly burst into angry shouting as the doors opened and Evoron stepped of the shadows between two huge statues of demons.

Evoron was especially pleased with that. Style was important.

“What is this?” a portly Threen shouted. “He has been exiled from this chamber!”

“I have his personal assurance that this will be worth our time. In fact, he has bet his life on it.”

“Thank you, boss,” Evoron said as he bowed, crossing his arms.

He stepped into the center of the circle.

“You have our rapt attention Evoron,” the Overboss said with an expectant smile. “Now, what has led you to wager your life in such a fashion.”

“Overboss. Assembly,” Evoron said with a smooth and easy smile. “I wish to announce that I have solved the Harkeen dilemma.”

“What?!?” Ashoon Harkeen shouted as he rose to his feet, reaching for his pistol.

“May I remind the Harkeen that we are on sacred ground?” the Overboss said, “And may I also advise caution? You face Evoron Zxxroahoa. You will get only one shot. If you fire, don’t miss.”

“And you should be grateful,” Evoron said with a smirk. “I have saved the Assembly the loss of face that your family has inflicted on all of us.”

“Now this I have to hear,” the Overboss said. “Pray tell, how did you do that?”

“To be fair to the Harkeen, there was no loss of face to begin with,” Evoron said, “This was not a disgraceful ‘defeat’ at the hands of a mere Plath. No. This was a simple turf war, something that is quite common amongst the families represented and far more respectable.”

“What?!?” Ashoon shouted.

Evoron smiled, pulled out a small holo projector, and paired it with his communicator.

He then pulled up his contact list and selected the one simply listed as “The Knives.”

The image of an old chuckie appeared.

“Yeh, bas?” the chuckie said.

The room exploded with shock and outrage, including Evoron’s brother and father.

“It was you?!?” Ashoon shouted with rage and pain. “You?!?”

“Yeh,” the chuckie said. “We work wit de Threen.”

“And with them, I took Harkeen’s former turf in the way such things are done these days. It is mine now. I am here to formalize my claim over all Harkeen interests outside of our home system.”

“You desecrated them!” his brother shouted. “This is... This... No! This cannot stand! Not even from you Broth... No. I cannot call you that any longer! I will kill you with my own claws!”

The Overboss said nothing. He just let out a quiet hiss and pulled out his blaster.

“...and that is exactly what everyone outside of this chamber will believe,” Evoron said, raising his voice to be heard over the shouting.

“Everyone shut up and sit down!” the Overboss yelled. After the room settled down (somewhat), he turned to Evoron and said, “Explain, now.”

“I would first like to point out that everyone present, including my own brother, believed that I would do something that horrific. Nobody questioned it for a moment.”

Evoron looked over at the hologram.

“Who actually contracted the hits?”

“Da frog.”

“What?!?” his brother shouted.

“Could we all please use something other than ‘What?’ It is getting tedious,” Evoron smiled. “I said that I would deal with ‘the frog,’ and I did exactly what I said. I ‘dealt’ with her. She has agreed not to take credit for the hits, which I must remind everyone here that she ‘never did’, and back up my claim to the carnage. This then becomes an internal turf war, a horrific one to be sure, but something that happens all the time. Our collective honor remains intact. My honor is destroyed now and forever, but it is a small price to pay, considering what it is already worth. I simply used mercenaries in lieu of the common thugs for which the Harkeen are well known. Nobody will question it.”

“If you think I’m gonna let you just eat off of my plate you are wrong!” Ashoon shouted, “Even if the Overboss says this was just a turf war. I’m gonna take it back and I’m gonna...”

This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

Evoron smiled and turned once again to the hologram.

“Sheloran held the contract until recently,” Evoron said, “Who holds it now? For whom do you now work?”

“U, bas.”

“In our ‘dealings,’ not only did I get Sheloran the Plath to allow me to take ‘credit’ for the massacre, but I also convinced her to get me in contact with the fine people she hired. A simple transaction later, and I will have them on retainer for an indefinite period of time.”

“Yeh,” the old chuckie said, “Da heavy liftin’ iz dun. Won’t tak much ‘cause u ain’t much.”

“Well put,” Evoron smiled. “While they will no longer desecrate their targets,” he continued, “that is a bit much even for me. They will still kill you with the same efficacy.”

“This is war!” Ashoon shouted. “You won’t leave this place alive!”

“I suspected that would be your reaction,” Evoron smiled.

“Colonel,” he said, “Would you please turn your camera towards the outside?”

The chuckie smirked and turned the camera to reveal the Harkeen family complex.

“With one word,” Evoron said, “the two companies that I brought will exterminate your entire family, and I mean your entire family, every man, woman, and child.”

“He grinned a fang laden smile.”

“Now, that is not beyond me. Your entire family will be erased. Everything you still have left will burn. However, I shall not have you killed. No. You will remain alive to lay wreaths over their numerous graves. Of course, you will have to plait them yourself. I doubt you will be able to afford them otherwise.”

Ashoon Harkeen fell silent.

“Now your ‘plate’ still has enough for you and your family to be comfortable for the rest of your days. If properly managed, it is more than enough to sustain your family for generations to come. Or you can continue this ‘war’ and lose it all. Your remaining thugs versus my soldiers, it’s your choice.”

Evoron moved to stand directly in front of him, meeting his gaze.

“I won’t eat from your plate. I will burn it to ash.”

Ashoon, trembling, sat down and hung his head.

“Then it is decided,” Evoron said. “I murdered the Harkeen, and I now control their business outside of the homeworld.”

The room sat in stunned silence, including his brother. Then the Overboss started clapping.

“You are one vile son of a bitch,” he said, “No offense meant,” he added, turning to Evoron’s shell-shocked father.”

“Not son of a bitch, bastard,” his father replied. “That thing is NOT my son.”

“My apologies,” the Overboss chuckled, “Vile bastard it is.”

“And my new family shall enrich the assembly, regardless of how it views me,” Evoron said smugly.

“Your family?” the Overboss asked as another door opened and a gilded cage surrounded with attendants, one holding a pain rod and another with a tranquilizer pistol at the ready, floated in.

Inside was a shackled and muzzled Threena in a wedding dress. She seemed rather put out over the whole affair.

“For your clever handling of this whole disgraceful affair,” the Overboss smiled, “I grant you the honor of my youngest daughter’s hand in marriage.”

The Threena growled as best as she could through the muzzle and viciously slammed against the bars of the cage, causing her attendants to back away nervously.

“Since you are now in need of one, I welcome you into my family ‘son’ and look forward to all of the wealth you will generate for your new family, mine.”

Growls of outrage were replaced by another sound, snickering.

While Threnka, the Overboss’s eldest daughter, was a vision of grace and beauty, Shavka, his youngest daughter, was well... um... she was pretty... but... had issues.

Among her other ‘issues,’ she had killed all of her previous suitors, torn them into pieces in fact.

“You vshark!” Evoron snarled, shocking the room into silence.

The Overboss laughed and walked over to Evoron, placing his arm around him.

“It’s fine,” he laughed, “Such words are exchanged among family all the time.”

Evoron stood there, completely stunned, as he looked into the Overboss’s gleaming, predatory eyes.

The Overboss whispered, “It will be a double wedding or no wedding at all.”

Evoron smiled, sighed, and shook his head.

“You are the Overboss for a reason... father.”

Shavka hissed and started attacking the bars containing her... with her head.

***

Later, the Overboss, Evoron, and Gravoon and Threnka, now officially engaged, all lounged in the Overboss’s private chambers.

“Gravoon, my boy,” the Overboss said as he sipped an amber liquid. “If I knew you could make things like this, your brother’s subterfuge would have been completely unnecessary. What is this, again?”

“Helios’s benediction,” Gravoon said as he took a sip. “Not my best run, but it will do.”

“Then I look forward to your best, my soon to be son,” the Overboss laughed and turned to Evoron. “However, your subterfuge was nearly as delicious as your brother’s craft. The look on Aroon’s face when he was silenced and sat down was sublime.”

He raised his glass towards Evoron.

“And your handling of this whole shameful affair was masterful. Giving you the Harkeen’s portion of the extrasolar business was a small price to pay.”

“And taking it all from me in a moment was equally masterful,” Evoron said as he raised his glass. “That I did not see coming.”

“Oh, the look on your face, brother,” Gravoon laughed as he and Threnka lounged together. “I truly wish I had a camera.”

“I did,” Evoron laughed. “Of course, I would record my moment of triumph. I shall send you my visage from multiple angles, as well as a recording of my heart rate.”

Everyone laughed, including Evoron.

“I am not bested often,” he said to the Overboss, “Respect unto you, father.”

“You are distressingly fine with this,” the Overboss said. “Should I be concerned?”

“Well,” Evoron said as he took another sip of his brother’s craft, “I was stunned and more than a little angry. That indecorous outburst was quite genuine. But then I thought about it. It is the ideal result.”

“How so?” the Overboss asked.

“Once it becomes apparent exactly how much profit I will make, I will have to expend more and more resources defending my turf and not just from the Harkeen. However...”

“However, now that it’s mine,” the Overboss said, “nobody will touch it both because they don’t want to oppose me and because you didn’t win. I bested you.”

“Precisely,” Evoron replied. “It was simple greed and pride that kept me from seeking this exact arrangement. To be perfectly honest, it kept me from even thinking of it.”

“Including sticking you with my little bundle of sunshine?” the Overboss asked.

“Another masterful stroke,” Evoron said, “I shall leave this system, never to return, and take one of your biggest headaches along.”

The Overboss’s expression changed to darkly serious.

“And it is well that you are. You killed my son. Granted, it was all in accordance with our customs, but given the difference in your abilities, it was nothing less than an execution. It has been long enough that I can look upon you and not be consumed with rage. But his mother? She will throw herself upon you with barrel and blade if she ever shares the room with you.”

He sighed and refilled his glass.

“I understand why you did it. I even understand that it...”

He closed his eyes.

“...that it had to happen. Still, he was my son, and I loved him. But, the offense was not yours. Oh, you were the blade that made the cut, and I will never truly forget that, but someone would have done it sooner or later. Ultimately, the fault lies with my household... and myself.”

He sighed and took another drink.

“He grew up pampered and spoiled, he was ruined by excess and a lax hand. I knew little of this, how horrid he had become.”

He scowled.

“Don’t tell the boss. The boss is busy, don’t bother him with this. The boss will be angry. So on and so forth. To be truthful, I was ‘busy,’ too busy to be a proper father. Had I known all of what was happening, I could have cuffed and stabbed him into line, as my father did for me.”

He shook his head.

“But I did not,” he sighed. “Him becoming Overboss would have been terrible. The whole assembly would fall apart, and he would be killed as another family took his place, not only him but the rest of my family as well. Your ‘cut’ was brutal but surgical. With that one death, you saved the lives of his sisters, his mother, my house, and my legacy. Once again, you did what had to be done and what nobody else would. I will never truly forgive you, but, Helios, forgive me, I have to thank you. For the sake of your life, we shall never speak of this again. Also, for the sake of your life, never call me father again. That privilege is extended solely to your brother.”

“Understood, boss,” Evoron said.

“Now, that that unpleasantness is over,” the Overboss said, his demeanor changing as if a switch was thrown, “Tell me how much those beautiful diamonds are actually worth, and exactly how much you think we can get for them, and everything else...”

Later, a much more cheerful and smiling Overboss said, “There is one more adjustment to your grand subterfuge that must be made.”

“Yes?” Evoron asked, bracing himself.

“Your brother has been most forthcoming,” the Overboss said. “You will not make him the first emperor of the Second Holy Empire. You will make him the second one.”

“Yes, boss.” Evoron said nodding respectfully. “That can be done.”

“Splendid,” the Overboss smiled. “Now, on to your impending wedding. I expect the ceremony prior to your departure. I also fully expect grandchildren. This is not a request. It will make my wife happy.”

“And with me dead and gone, you can then appoint whoever you wish to replace me,” Evoron chuckled. “I hate to disappoint, but I will seduce your daughter before sunrise.”

The Overboss laughed.

“I fear that is beyond even you.”

“Tomorrow, she will be a giddy bride, eager to marry me, even willing to be fitted with a real wedding dress, not that peasant’s sackcloth you somehow managed to stretch over her,” Evoron smiled.

“Ha!”

“Care to make a wager?” Evoron asked.

“Careful, father,” Gravoon said, “The more outlandish the bet, the more likely he is to win.”

“Still,” the Overboss said, “I must see this.”

Evoron withdrew an ancient gold xvara, a very valuable coin from a much more enlightened era.

“Overboss,” Gravoon said, “That is his prized possession. Do not bet anything you are fully prepared to lose, Helios knows how.”

“I will meet it,” the Overboss said. “I just happen to have an entire Encyclopedia Materia from the last year of its publication.”

Evoron gasped.

“It is yours if you succeed.”

“Pack it up,” Evoron smiled, “It will be mine come morning. Have Shavka sent to my ship. Her quarters have already been prepared. Then release her.”

“Release her?” the Overboss asked.

“Bindings and bars greatly complicate seduction, at least the way I prefer to do it,” Evoron replied. “I can’t very well woo her while she is in a cage, can I?”

“Very well,” the Overboss chuckled. “I look forward to seeing what is left of you tomorrow.”

***

Shavka prowled the walls of the locked chamber. She was now trapped, her wedding dress ripped apart and now wrapped around her breasts and loins in a much more practical garment...

One well suited to absolutely murdering that little runt.

She glanced over at the ‘wedding bed’ now nothing but splinters and shards...

The longest of which, the length of the bed itself, was clutched in two of her hands while the other two were shaving one end into a murderously sharp tip.

She was going to run that little shit through. Yes, he did kill her turd of a brother, but even that would not spare him.

He was going to be yet another corpse for the pile.

Her head popped up at the sound of her sister Threnka’s voice coming from the speaker beside the door.

“Shavka, we are opening the door. Please do not do anything until you hear us out.”

“What is this, sister?” Shavka snarled. “Are you finally betraying me, too?”

“I swear that I am not. Please, just let Evoron say his piece before you attack. He released you from your cage and is allowing you to face him fang to fang. He deserves words before blood.”

“Fine,” Shavka said, “Let the runt in.”

“I can’t help but notice that you are still holding a crude, but very effective spear,” Evoron’s voice said. “Would it be too much to ask that you set it aside?”

“Yes, it would.”

“Very well,” Evoron said, “I’m entering now, completely unarmed.”

The door opened and Evoron and Threnka entered to be greeted by a hiss and a readied spear.

“To start,” Evoron said raising all of his hands in a Threen gesture of supplication and peace, “I have absolutely no intention of trying to assert my marital privileges... ever. I will never lay a single hand on you. Not out of lust, in any event.”

The spear wavered slightly as Shavka looked at him, confused.

“This is purely a political marriage,” Evoron said. “I am already in love with another... as are you.”

“What?” Shavka snarled.

“I really must give everyone thesauruses,” Evoron sighed.

“What?”

Evoron just sighed.

“He knows, Shavka,” her sister said.

“You told him?!?”

“I did not! I swear it!” Threnka cried. “He already knew, devils knows how. He was the one who approached me after our meeting with father! The only thing he didn’t know was who it was.”

A pretty young threena rushed into the room.

“Voo!” Shavka cried as she cast aside her spear and embraced her beloved.

“How... How did you know?” she asked Evoron.

“I entertain many at my residence where wine and a relaxed attitude about all things, homosexuality included, yield conversations not possible elsewhere,” Evoron said, “People notice and people talk. The rumors concerning you, especially from your youth, and your... rather strong reaction to being approached in an amorous fashion led me to think this might be the case. A few discreet inquiries and a little coin provided the confirmation. Considering our currently benighted culture’s views of such, I thought I may be able to use it as blackmail over your family. However, fate has decreed otherwise. Instead of blackmail,” he smiled, “a bribe. Be my ‘wife’ and spend your wedding night with who it really should be, now and forever.”

He smiled and cautiously stepped forward.

“After our wedding we shall depart for Terra, never to return. On Terra, things such as that do not matter. You shall be able to walk together hand in hand freely. There, we will build a criminal empire of such wealth and power that you will be able do whatever you please anywhere you want.”

Shavka held her love close and looked at him.

“T-truly?”

“Truly,” Evoron smiled. “As I said, I love another, and they await me on Terra. You shall have your marriage and I...”

He sighed sadly.

“I will have what I have.”

He quickly regained his composure.

“On Terra, many miracles are possible. For example, you could bear a child of mine without our bodies ever touching.”

Shavka’s eyes widened.

“In fact, you and... Voo?”

“Voolshia,” Shavka said.

“You and Voolshia could have a child and I would claim it as my own.”

“What?!?”

“I made inquiries this afternoon,” Evoron said, “It is not only possible, it is a fairly common procedure among same sex couples. The xenologist I conferred with assured me that Threen genetic material is not overly challenging. I admit I got lost in the details but they seemed quite confident.”

He bowed, crossing his arms in a traditional fashion.

“So, bearing all of that in mind,” he said, “Shavka, my love, my sun, my stars, my beginning, and my end, would you do me the honor of becoming my bride?”

Shavka and Voolshia burst into tears, holding one another.

“Yes!” Shavka exclaimed. “Yes! A thousand times, Yes!”

“Splendid!” Evoron exclaimed. “Do you think you can tolerate some semblance of affection before your family?”

“I will strip you, throw you over the breakfast table, and break it beneath us!” Shavka bellowed.

“As intriguing as that sounds,” Evoron smiled, “I think a simple kiss will suffice.”