Chapter 319: Why, yes, I might know where a dungeon is. Are you looking for one?
Chapter 319: Why, yes, I might know where a dungeon is. Are you looking for one?
Ozzy looked around quickly. He didn't see people who were angry or threatening. What he saw were people who were interested in seeing what was going to happen next. He needed to delay, at least until he got to his pie. Doris had just come out of the kitchen, humming some tune he didn't recognize. She ignored everyone and set down a platter with a huge porterhouse steak in front of Ozzy. Next of it, she set not one, but two pies. "You look like an apple pie sort of guy, but I'm not always the best judge of a man's character, especially if you ask my mother. So I brought a peach pie as well. Both are hot out of the oven." She refilled his coffee and patted him on the shoulder as she left.
He cut a piece of the steak and chewed it. It was prime beef, medium rare and done to perfection. He really hoped things could be worked out, this place had great food. Eliza looked at him and said, "Well?"
"Well what? You said you were going to ask questions and you made a veiled threat that other people would ask them differently. I don't see a reason I should quit eating just because you didn't like my first answers. Go ahead, ask away."
There were murmurs from people watching, and someone obviously agreed with him and yelled for two pies from the kitchen. Eliza took her pen and said to him, "What is your name?"
"Starting with the tough ones I see. My name is Ozzy. I've gone by a few others, but that's what everyone calls me now. Do your skills think I'm telling the truth? I'm assuming you have something otherwise this is sort of a waste of an interrogation from your side of things."
Grudgingly, she nodded. "Yes, I think that was a true statement. What level are you? And what is your class?"
Ozzy ate three more bites of the steak, cut a slice of pie, and then said. "I'm a Contract Worker and my subclass is Butcher. I kill creatures, cut them up, and haul them off to my smokehouse. Or grind them into sausage. I'm level 12. Highest level butcher in all of Sedgewick, although Runt isn't far behind."
Eliza nodded, but seemed frustrated. Someone yelled a further question. "What the hell is a Contract Worker? Some sort of practitioner of the Dark Arts who has made a contract with a Demon?"
Ozzy laughed. "No, but you're close. More like a person with not enough money that signed a five-year contract to work for the ACME corporation. I work 16 hours a day and don't get a lot of days off. And I've got special abilities that make me like doing that, and others that make it easier to keep working. Probably why I walked through your magical 'go away' spell. Contract workers don't care and don't notice those things." He hadn't finished the steak yet, but the peach pie was beckoning to him.
"A player? You are someone from another world?" Ozzy shook his head. "Not a player, a worker." He turned and looked at the person asking the last couple of questions. He was wearing thick, baggy woolen clothes of good make, huge boots that reached to mid-thigh and a heavy green felt cloak. "I thought this was common knowledge, at least in the empire."
The man sat down at the table and produced a clay mug. "Do you mind?" Ozzy nodded and the man poured a cup of coffee. "Most of us roam the world far and wide, and don't keep up on the latest news. But we did here of new travelers coming from another world. So, you are saying that all of the people working for the corporations are of this new class? Contract worker? And all of you can walk through a protective ward that should scramble your brains? That is very powerful magic."
Ozzy shrugged. "I'm sure some of you have worked until you fell down in the mud. You know how hard it is. I can do that every day and feel good about it. Think about those implications before you decide that it's a good thing. I also only need four hours of sleep a night, can eat most anything, and I'm good at Digging and Hauling. I'm sure you can imagine what my days are like." He held up his hands, showing the dark red gloves he wore. "These hands kill a hundred creatures a day and I tear the guts and bones from the corpses until blood runs like a stream to a pool." He looked around the room. "And it doesn't bother me at all. I didn't even notice your little spell. I just wanted a cup of coffee. These pies from Doris are a bonus though, and the steak is great. Our meats a bit poisonous until we smoke it."
The old man with the cloak and impressive boots was smiling. He held out his hand. "I'm Vandalis, or just Vandal for short. Good to meet you, Ozzy." Ozzy took his hand and smiled at him, then went back to eating. He might actually get through this.
Eliza wasn't convinced. "You accept that?"
Vandalis looked at her and raised an eyebrow, "And you don't? My abilities aren't as sharp as yours, and I can tell that he's mostly telling the truth. Can't you?" She scowled again. "Yes. I think he's telling the truth. But look at him! How does a 'lowly worker' gain all the magical items he's wearing? Gloves, rings, earrings and of all things, a magical armored apron?"
Ozzy patted his apron. "Hey, my friend Ben made this for me! This is prime Sedge Bull leather! And I earned my items the old fashioned way: killing things and pulling them from loot chests. I see quite a bit of loot in this room, so I'm sure you understand the process."
Eliza's little outburst caused a half-dozen people to come over and look at Ozzy through narrowed eyes.
"That is nice leather. Sedge Bull, you say?"
"I like the gloves, very thematic, any idea where they come from?"
"I want to know about those tattoos, those have to be summoning aids, you can feel it."
Ozzy turned to the the large man who had commented about his Bloody Butcher's Gloves. "Yeah, I like them. They came out of the Pit of the Butcher. I'm hoping to head into there on the next day off I get. It's a little rough for Tier three though."
Vandalis had a gleam in his eye. "Ah, a dungeon? You have a dungeon near your little town! That explains your levels and your magical items. Would you be willing to give the Order of Heracles some information on it? Dungeons are hard to find these days, which leads to many of us being bored and looking for challenges." There were murmurs from around the room.
Ozzy slowed down his intake. Even Eliza seemed interested now. "Well, I have to get a little information first. I'm sure you understand. How about I sit and eat my pie while you tell me about your order, and what sort of dungeon you are looking for? The Pit is pretty tough."
That brought smiles and a few bits of laughter. The overall attitude seemed to be, "We like tough."
Vandalis nodded. "Fair enough, an exchange of information then. We're a loose group of adventurers who have banded together to share information and take on mighty quests. Sometimes we stop an invasion of trolls. Other years we explore unknown lands, seeking out dungeons and adventure, while taming the lands for nobles to claim. Mostly we try to stay out of each others way and minimize conflicts between our groups. The meeting Eliza mentioned happens tonight. We'll be going over ideas and agendas will be put forth. Information on your dungeon would be very welcome."
Ozzy slurped his coffee loudly, finishing the cup. "Boy, I sure do like this coffee. We only have some overpriced crappy stuff where I'm from. I swear it's half chicory and the other half is mud." Vandalis took the hint, and soon Doris walked out of the kitchen with a ten-pound bag of beans. She put the package on the table in front of Ozzy, refilled his cup, and left another pot. Someone else had produced a bottle of whiskey and put a shot in front of him along with a cigar. Chuckling, he lit the cigar with his finger and puffed out large clouds of smoke. He tossed down the whiskey, noting the slight burn that came from 190 proof alcohol.
"Well, to tell you the truth, folks. We don't have a dungeon in Sedgewick..."
He looked around the room, pausing. "We have two. The Bunny Barrow is low Tier but great for beginners. A necromancer named Benny T. Bunny rules it with a horde of undead rabbits. He answers to the Boss of the other dungeon. There's a funny story about how it got its name: The Lair of the Under Rodent, Sponsored by Blud Dark." There was a moment of silence as he said this, and then howls of laughter, followed by the bartender pouring a round of Blud Extra Dark for everyone. Ozzy related the story of how Suzette invented the recipe for the beer and then found a corporate sponsor for the dungeon.
"What level is it?"
"Hard to say. We have a small guild exploring it now. They are all high in the Third Tier and are just able to clear down to the third floor and deal with The Big Rat. They thought he was the dungeon boss, but he was just the guardian to the fourth level. No one has ever seen the Under Rodent, and we don't know how deep the dungeon goes. I'll tell you, though, they take their traps seriously in that place."
"Two dungeons. But you mentioned another called the Pit of the Butcher. Is that nearby?"
Ozzy slowly sipped his coffee and continued to keep the audience hooked on his stories. "You could say that. We opened up the ancient lost city of Gadobhra a year ago. Maybe you've heard of it? It was warded with that shunning magic and a hellacious magical security system. It was hidden only a mile north of Sedgewick. After we opened it up and Baron William claimed it, we did a little exploring. So far we know of four dungeons. The Menagerie is fantastical beasts left over from a zoo. We have a few Fae hunting parties that go in, and mostly come back out. It's always an adventure in there, with Tier Three and Tier Four bosses. The Fae are big on trophy hunts.
"The Crypts are just starting to get explored. I'm going in with the Baron this week to kill a few ghouls and see what we can see. On the far side of the city is the old noble quarter. There's something there called The Endless Dance. The Baroness said to steer clear of it, and the few people that went in didn't last long. And then we have the Pit of the Butcher. It keeps me busy. The Big Boss down at the bottom demands meat. Tons of raw meat. He turns them into daemons that roam the hallways. Pretty nasty place. The first floor is Tier Three, but it's gets tougher very fast. My personal source of information tells me that there are no less than two dozen sub-bosses in there, and the Pit goes down at least ten floors and hits at minimum Tier 6. Big nasty place that leaks dark mana continuously."
He paused for a moment. Eliza was scribbling furiously as she tried to take down his words. Vandalis drummed his fingers on the table. "And what does the Baron of this cursed city demand of people who wish to explore his dungeons?"
Ozzy spread his hands. "Probably above my pay grade, but I do advise him a bit. The Fae Lords are paying a pretty penny to hunt in The Menagerie. But I'm sure Baron William would cut a deal for an upstanding order like you represent. I could suggest 100 gold per person to explore The Pit or the Endless Dance. He'll probably let you into the Crypts for cheap. He really hates the ghouls. Oh, and don't let the mages guild give you any shit. Head over to the teleporter by the Legion Barracks that Rastfian the earth mage is in charge of. He's got a deal with the Baron for cheap teleports."
The conversation grew loud, and then a halfling dressed in furs and a Viking helmet started laughing. "Rastian? Rastian the Sausage Slayer? Rat's Ass sausage burner? I know who you are now! They've been telling the story about how the whole mage's guild attacked you and blew up your sausage. They say your were going to kill them all if the Duchess hadn't shown up and saved them."
Ozzy chuckled. "She almost killed them herself. That was her sausage." Ozzy had finished the peach pie and his steak, and was just about to cut into the apple pie and see if it came close to Betty's back in Sedgewick. He never got to take the bite. Two boys tumbled into the room, yelling. "Hey, mister! Someone is stealing your wagon. A bunch of angry guys ran up and hauled it off. We yelled at them and told them our dad would burn their balls and shrivel their souls, but they still took it! Sorry."
Ozzy jumped up and headed for the door. As he ran, heat started pouring off of him and two huge axes appeared in his hands, dripping flames. Vandalis put the coffee in a pocket of his cloak. "I'll save this for him, or deliver it myself." He turned to the two boys. "And how many times do I have to tell you that you can't go threatening people with ball burning! I promised your mother not to do that anymore! The one time was an accident!"
He shooed them back out the door with a gust of wind. "Now go chase the Butcher and see where he goes. I'll be along shortly in case he needs help." He reached for the apple pie that Ozzy had left.