You Boys Play Games Very Well

26-29: I affirm your capability to be a broadcaster, but you want to cultivate me.

Chapter 26

To show respect, powder would send a cat courtyard to an anchor, which would be broadcast on the whole platform. For a time, the same ostentatious announcement would appear in the most eye-catching areas of all the Fighting Cat live broadcasts.

Having spent the night in the broadcast rooms of Lemon Dad and Mang God, the audience, who were on the verge of despair, welcomed this sudden finale. Their initial reaction was as muddled with shock as Ling Meng’s.

However, when they did react, it wasn’t clear who started the rhythm first. In the barrage between the two live broadcasts, the phrase “love ♂ nest” was brushed up.

— Mang God sent Lemon Dad the big house!

— I have a room, do you have anybody?

— Stimulated by that late-night handsome guy, Mang God decided to show off his wealthy side!

When Ling Meng had been lurking in Mang God’s broadcast room, he had seen system announcements for a lot of local tyrants delivering cat courtyards to female anchors and sometimes some powder also sent them to Mang God, but he did not expect Shan Zhu to make such a display.

Ling Meng was inexplicably a little flustered. The first thing he did in his panic was raise his hand to turn off the camera.

Seeing that the anchor’s face cam suddenly turned black, the water friends who wanted to see Lemon Daddy’s reaction rejected it and collectively brushed the screen in protest.

— Why turn off the camera?

— The anchor is bashful.

— Were you moved to cry and are too embarrassed to show us?

Ling Meng coughed dryly: “No, uh what, my camera is out of power.”

— Oh, your camera is plugged in, really [smile]

— The anchor of the big house says everything is all right [smile]

— Next broadcast, remember to bring a battery, oh [smile]

“Uh…”

— Mang God took the initiative to attack, Lime Dad’s frightened in comparison!

— Lemon Daddy, don’t be scared, the waves will wave!

— Lemon Daddy, shouldn’t you say something now to thank him for delivering the cat food?

“Thank you, Mang God, for sending the cat courtyard…to affirm my capability as a broadcast anchor.” Ling Meng said a line that only the two of them could understand, so it sounded quite perfunctory to the audience.

— Routine, full of routine.

— Sincerity! A little more sincerity!

— So your capability is really great, oh~

“We have to turn off the lights soon. If I don’t turn off the computer, it’ll flicker,” Ling Meng explained dryly, but no one believed it.

Housekeeper Mangosteen: Come on, the CPU will flicker.

Ling Meng breathed a sigh of relief, only fellow students could understand the pain of lights out. He quickly said goodbye, shut down the computer, and, in the blink of an eye, the brightly lit dormitory was in the dark.

Chapter 27

Ling Meng was tangled up in bed, holding his glowing phone. He had had the WeChat window open for ten minutes, hesitating over returning the money to Shan Zhu.

Although an anchor would be very happy to receive the gift, knowing the person who gave it made him feel a little embarrassed because it was different from gifts given by people he’d never met before.

Shan Zhu: Good night.

While he was wavering, Shan Zhu sent a message over first. Struck by impulse, Ling Meng sent a red envelope of two hundred.

The instant he did it, he began to regret it. He didn’t know if 200 was enough to buy a cat courtyard.

The other side accepted it and the transfer progress showed on the display.

Shan Zhu: I’m affirming your capability to broadcast, but you want to keep me (like a mistress)?

Ling Meng: …

Suddenly, he was no longer conflicted and he even wanted to take the red envelope back!

Ling Meng: Old driver, teach me, how did you accelerate from a speed of 0 to 200?

Shan Zhu: Two hundred yuan of oil was added.

Ling Meng: If I give you two thousand, can’t you just fly up to heaven?

Shan Wei: DaddyTakesYouFlying.gif

……very good! Here’s another one brushing his expression pack!

If this chat screenshot leaked out, Ling Meng could guess how the title of the post would be written:

— Shocked! Fighting Cat platform anchor undertook such a deal in private…

— Shocked! The reason why the famous Mang God is boosting the new anchor is…

— Shocked! When the male anchor wants to become a popular anchor, he has to pay a monetary bribe…

Ling Meng: Are there any other anchors that have offered to bribe you to help with growing grass?

Shan Zhu: Yes, many.

Ling Meng: Really?

Ling Meng’s spirit of gossip was ignited.

Ling Meng: How is it done?

Shan Zhu: It’s the method you’ve summed up: faking gay to sell rot and brushing gifts.

Shan Zhu: Brush a courtyard, receive two courtyards worth of money.

Ling Meng carefully calculated; he actually owed a lot of money.

Ling Meng: You agreed?

Shan Zhu: No.

Ling Meng: Why?

Shan Zhu: Not motivated by money.

Ling Meng wasn’t nosy about Shan Zhu’s income. He only knew that he wasn’t poor. After all, there were so many legends about millions in anchor revenue across the country. Such a Shan Zhu was certainly not moved by money.

Shan Zhu: There’s also sex appeal.

Ling Meng: You agreed to that?

Shan Zhu: No.

Ling Meng: Why?

Shan Zhu: Didn’t have your good looks.

…I thank you, oh!

Ling Meng: I’m serious! Don’t brush gifts to me in the future!

Ling Meng: Don’t let money taint our friendship!

Shan Zhu: In that case, no friendship.

Ling Meng:???

Ling Meng: You want to cut off all ties with me?

Shan Zhu: Go to bed early.

Having said these words, Shan Zhu didn’t respond again, which made Ling Meng confused. He just said that Shan Zhu shouldn’t brush gifts to him, but even friends had to allowed to do that?

Chapter 28

Ling Meng dozed off with his mind spinning in confusion. The next morning, he was awakened by a knock at the door. Shan Zhu stood there in the entryway with a steamed bun and soy milk, obviously he had no intention to break off ties.

Ling Meng, not yet fully awake, was stunned until he remembered that today was Friday and that Shan Zhu had said that he would bring him breakfast.

“You really brought me breakfast,” Ling Meng scratched his unkempt hair, ashamed. “This feels a little awkward.”

“Didn’t you treat me to a meal yesterday?”

Meal? What meal? Ling Meng carefully reviewed the previous day, but he only remembered the red envelope of two hundred.

…deep affection for this lemon peel which was also on the lemon’s body?

“That’s not a meal, that’s…”

Ling Meng froze up.

“Well?”

Ling Meng was struck speechless, could I say my brain seized up?

“Is it really that difficult…”

“No!” Ling Meng quickly stepped on the accelerator (for his stalled brain).

His roommate was woken up by the scent and saw the two standing at the door.

“Mang God? Why are you here?”

“Delivering breakfast to MengMeng.”

“How come Mang God is bringing breakfast for MengMeng?” He looked envious. “Did you order Mang Group takeout?”

“I still have class, I’ll go first.” Shan Zhu stuffed the soymilk and steamed bun into Ling Meng’s hands and instructed him, “Breakfast must be eaten.”

“Oh, okay.”

Ling Meng took the bun into the room, habitually turning on his computer and going online. There were few people in the game this early in the morning and all his friends were offline. It was difficult to match with opponents by looking for ranked matches, so Ling Meng just clicked the casual match menu.

Casual matches weren’t separated by rank so great gods could run into novices and destroy the beautiful ambition they held towards the game.

Ling Meng encountered such a person: the account level was not high and the rank was zero.

[Federation] Lemon: Galaxy newcomer? Daddy will be merciful.

The other side didn’t speak, as if they couldn’t figure out how to chat.

Ling Meng played while eating, using 50% of his strength. It wasn’t until the southwest corner was attacked by the other side that Ling Meng realized the situation wasn’t good.

It seemed that it wasn’t a newbie; it was most likely a small account. Ling Meng put down his food and started taking the game seriously.

Despite his disadvantageous position, Ling Meng still was confident he could make a comeback. After all, under the training of Shan Zhu, Ling Meng’s skills and techniques had been significantly improved and his national ranking had risen to 250. As a god-level player, losing to passers-by in casual matches would be pretty humiliating.

Twenty minutes later, Ling Meng sat stiffly in front of the computer, staring at the imposing black and white screen in front of his eyes. He couldn’t believe that he actually lost and that he had even lost so very badly. Even if he played with all his strength from the beginning, he probably wouldn’t have won.

The game over interface would only last a few seconds. Ling Meng came back to himself and quickly typed out a line with the same hands that had gifted hospice care for so many years.

[Federation] Lemon: What’s your big account?

The opponent didn’t reply and quickly withdrew from the room.

Depressed, Ling Meng fell back in his chair with sigh of resentment caught up in his chest.

Even when he lost to Mang God, he didn’t feel so troubled: the other side was a known great god so even if he lost, there was no psychological stress over it.

Ling Meng opened his opponent’s match record and was surprised to find that this small account, which hadn’t participated in ranking matches at all, had not lost once in his fifty-seven match career.

Fifty-seven consecutive wins. Even if they were all casual matches, it was quite a stunning achievement.

Ling Meng: I was totally abused.

If Ling Meng said, “I was defeated,” Shan Zhu might not be particularly surprised; after all, Ling Meng was not a top ace in the national rankings. But what he said was, “I was completely abused,” which indicated a bit of a mishap. After all, to completely abuse Lemon Daddy, you would have to be at least in the top ten.

Shan Zhu: Who was it?

Ling Meng: I don’t know, some small account.

He took two screenshots and sent them, the battle record from the match and the small account’s winning streak.

The experienced Shan Zhu knew, at first glance, that Ling Meng had not met an ordinary person.

Shan Zhu: Did you save the match video?

Ling Meng: Saved.

Shan Zhu: Wait for me to watch it.

At noon, Shan Zhu came to Ling Meng’s room and reviewed the whole match with him.

It could be seen that Ling Meng played relatively casually in the early stage, obviously not thinking much of his opponent. In the middle stage, he began to get serious, because the opponent was so strong. However, Ling Meng failed to make a comeback even with all his strength and everything collapsed in the late stage.

Shan Zhu carefully watched it twice and concluded: “He’s really strong. Maybe even I wouldn’t be a worthy opponent.”

“Not even you? Is it a professional player?”

“It’s not outside the realm of possibility, but he didn’t play with all his strength.”

“What?” Ling Meng couldn’t believe it.

“Look at the technology tree for each of his matches; it’s not the mainstream upgrade route. It’s obvious that he is using this small account as a test to experiment with an unfamiliar play style.”

Ling Meng was speechless. If the other party really was as fierce as Shan Zhu said, it was no surprise that he lost.

“I want to fight him.” Shan Zhu tapped his finger on the left mouse button, as if he was thinking.

“You want to arrange a match with him? How can you do that?”

“I don’t know. First, we have to find this guy.”

Chapter 29

@Mangosteen: If anyone knows this friend named Guava, please let me know. I admire his strength very much and would like the opportunity to ask him for advice. Thank you.

[screenshot of Guava’s game data.jpg]

— @FanA: What’s this? Mang God overtly issuing a letter of challenge?

— @FanB: I went and checked the record of this person, fifty-seven consecutive victories and zero defeats. This is General Chang Sheng. [screenshot of Guava’s historical record.jpg]

— @FanC: It must be a small account, but I don’t know whose small account.

— @FanD: Mang God VS Mysterious Small Account God, looking forward to it a little.

……

— @FanJ: The last match this ID played was this morning against Lemon and it was a victory with a huge margin.

— @FanK: So…this is Lemon Daddy being tragically KO slaughtered and Mang God wanting to stand in for him?

— @FanL: Mang God guarding his baby’s heart is understandable, but IMHO I’m not convinced he could win.

……

It was twenty-four hours later when a newly registered account replied to this Weibo post.

— @Guava: Ok.

The battle between Mangosteen and Guava was scheduled for Sunday night. In addition to Mang God’s, Lemon Daddy’s broadcast room was also crowded with people because he was going to do the guest commentary for the match.

Ling Meng, who had never served as a commentator, has done a lot of preparatory work, but he only had information on Shan Zhu for the player side of things. For Guava, besides the 57-game winning streak and his one personal experience, the information he knew was basically zero.

Before the game began, Ling Meng sent a WeChat message to Shan Zhu.

Ling Meng: I’m so nervous.

Shan Zhu: I’m the one playing, what are you nervous about?

Ling Meng: The opponent is likely a pro, I’m afraid you’ll lose.

Shan Zhu: Would you be disappointed if I lost?

Ling Meng: Don’t fuss, it’s normal to lose to professional players.

Ling Meng: There are so many people watching, I’m afraid that your powder watching you lose will be disappointed.

If Ling Meng were around, Shan Zheng would really want to pinch his face.

Shan Zhu: I just want to hold a training match with him, it doesn’t matter if I win or lose.

Shan Zhu: Even if I lose, it would be because of the strength of the other side, there’s nothing to worry about.

Shan Zhu: You don’t have to be nervous either. Don’t forget that every day in the Federation-Empire, you are Lemon Daddy, oh

Shan Zhu: DadIsFearless.gif

Ling Meng was amused by his own expression pack, so his nervous mood was greatly diluted.

Ling Meng: If you win, I will send you a big house too!

Shan Zhu: It’s better to privately transfer the money. I’d rather you keep me.

Ling Meng: Brake!

Ling Meng found that if he hung around Shan Zhu for a long time, the level of braking would increase more and more.

Shan Zhu: If I lose, I also have something ready to say.

Ling Meng: What will you say?

Shan Zhu: YouBoysPlayGamesVeryWellOh~.gif

Ling Meng: Mud!

The barrage came rushing forth like a high tide: tonight’s other protagonist had arrived, an unranked small account, without even an avatar. The more simple it was, the more mysterious it seemed.

[Room] Mangosteen: Thank you for coming.

[Room] Guava: It’s nothing, just casual.

The audience gasped when they saw this. The other side obviously didn’t put any weight in this match, it was just to pass the time.

[Room] Mangosteen: My friend and I are both broadcasting live, you don’t mind?

[Room] Guava: Oh, don’t worry. I don’t watch live broadcasts, I won’t stream snipe.

It was clear the other side understood the implication of Shan Zhu’s words. Shan Zhu said nothing more and entered the match directly. They were doing a non-random scenario, that is, they could choose the faction they wanted to use before the start.

Ling Meng was wearing a good mic. During a normal competition, the commentator and the audience could see the game screens of the players on both sides. However, this match was quite special and Ling Meng could only explain from a single perspective.

“We don’t really know much about this Guava. What kind of faction he’s good at and which he’s going to play isn’t known. I am afraid that this is really a blind fight for Mang God.

“Unexpectedly, Mang God has selected the alien faction. Everyone knows the aliens are the faction Mang God is most skilled with. There are few people playing aliens and ordinary players don’t have much experience with them.

“Mang God has locked in his faction, the countdown is going. In mere moments, we’ll see the opponent’s choice, he chose …”

Ling Meng suddenly raised his tone: “It’s also alien!”

—

Footnotes:

1. local tyrant (土豪): slang for arrogant, wealthy people

2. old driver (老司机): originally a slang term for someone who likes to talk dirty, has evolved to mean someone who is experienced (a veteran)

3. General Chang Sheng (常胜将军): an idiom meaning the commander who wins every battle, someone who is effective in strategy, planning, and command deployment

4. Brake (刹车): To curb bad habits

5. Mud (泥垢): Internet slang homonym for “you’re too much!”, indicating anger at the behavior of the other person, can also be said jokingly

—

Sometimes I just want to pat Ling Meng on the head, he’s so oblivious.

Next chapter you’ll have to decide: are you #TeamMango or #TeamGuava