You Boys Play Games Very Well

55-57: What’s the point of kissing, I don’t believe it’s more fun than playing games

Chapter 55

Hearing Ling Meng’s threat, the water friends turned their attitude around 180 degrees: Lemon Daddy is the best, Lemon Daddy is super fierce, Lemon Daddy is the number one on Fighting Cat.

The tsundere Daddy was pleased and didn’t shout to shut down the broadcast anymore. He started riding the black with Shan Zhu.

Shan Zhu taught him how to perform a strafing drift with his own hands, the beautiful technique Ling Meng had only seen Guava use in battle.

“I learned it from watching Guava’s battle video, too,” Shan Zhu admitted frankly.

Ling Meng was surprised, he had also privately downloaded and watched the Fruit match several times. In addition to feeling of Guava’s technique again and again slipping away, he couldn’t simulate his technique at all.

Guava.SVIP: The mouse must first go down and then up, use the skill at the lowest possible point in an instant.

Guava.SVIP: I can teach you too.

Ling Meng: …..

The first time he witnessed Guava saying such a long sentence, truly worthy of a game-idiot.

Shan Zhu: “Thank you, Guava, for providing remote assistance.”

— Understand everything, why was there stress on the syllables of ‘remote’?

— Emphasizing that only you can give personal guidance?

— Unscrupulous Mang God, bullying Gua too much.

— Eating melon, the masses can’t look down on it anymore.

Guava.SVIP: That background is the e-sport cafe in the University City, I’ve been there.

— Guava hinting to Mang God not to provoke him, I could go if I wanted to.

— Guava threatening to sow trouble with Mang God, I know where you are.

— Guava intended to take away MengMeng, then put Mang God on the squad, killing two birds with one stone.

“Eh? Did you come to surf the internet too?” Ling Meng was surprised, this was the first time Guava had mentioned something to do with his real life.

Guava.SVIP: Do demos.

This internet cafe was one of the largest in the University City, often hosting a variety of leagues. It was also common for professional players to be invited to do demos.

“Please tell me in advance next time; this internet cafe is close to our school. I’ll cheer you on.”

“We two together will cheer you on,” Shan Zhu added with a smile.

Guava.SVIP: Your comprehension is very good. Want to play pro?

“….No, thank you.”

Ling Meng shot Shan Zhu a mocking (silly) smile, but the cam feed in the eyes of the audience had another interpretation.

— MengMeng looked in the eyes of Mang God and was full of admiration.

— MengMeng: A pro team is desperately trying to poach him, my family’s Mang God is so great!

— Have you all forgotten that our MengMeng is the chief Mang blower?

— All I know is that Mang God is an unconditional Lemon blower, he looks at MengMeng and everything is good.

“It’s not that I see him as good at anything, it just goes without saying that MengMeng is good,” Shan Zhu happened to read the barrage.

— Yes yes yes, your identity of chief Ning blower has been added to your V certification, no more need to prove it.

“You…doesn’t it make you blush to say such a thing in public?”

“Why would I blush when I’m telling the truth?” Shan Zhu asked frankly.

Shan Zhu leaned in close, whispering in Ling Meng’s ear and Ling Meng’s face turned red so fast it was visible.

What he said was, “we boys never blush when talking to people.” The subtext was that Ling Meng blushed when he talked to girls.

However, Ling Meng couldn’t explain because this sentence made his blood boil. He didn’t want to admit it was because Shan Zhu’s breath brushed his ear. His feeling of shame turned into an expression of anger.

“You, you speak nonsense!”

— What the hell did he say!

— I just love to listen to some nonsense, why not listen to it?

— Live whisper, there’s no professional ethics!

— Someone! Get me my 800,000-watt hearing aid!

Chapter 56

The two were officially broadcasting together for the first time and ended with Shan Zhu being ambiguous, Ling Meng stamping his foot, and the water friends switching from flattering comments to kicking up a fuss. If it weren’t for the dormitory curfew, Ling Meng would be really reluctant to leave the internet speed here.

If dating was all done like this, there wasn’t anything wrong with it.

On the way back to the dormitory, Ling Meng acted on a whim and pulled Shan Zhu to the single dog abuse road.

Dog Abuse Road had a very beautiful, poetic name, because the scenery along the way was known as a sacred place – along the road, couples could be seen arm in arm. Over time, the single dog hatred had resulted in the name Dog Abuse Road. Even the original name had been forgotten.

Ling Meng had been a member of those single dogs abused along this road and now that he had been unilaterally declared off the list, he also wanted to know what it felt like to be on the other side of the dog abuse.

Time was approaching midnight and only a few street lights were on as night lighting. On Dog Abuse Road, there were a few people, some also in pairs, so that Ling Meng’s plan to find some single dogs all over the place failed.

“Two people walking together feels the same as walking alone, it’s nothing special.”

“Haven’t you walked this road with your classmates?”

“Of course we had to for two classes, we went through here before and after class.”

“Do you think there’s a difference between us walking together like this and walking with your classmates?

“…..no.”

Shan Zhu grabbed his wrist and forcefully interlocked their fingers. “Since this is Dog Abuse Road, it’s necessary to have the appearance of dog abuse. I’ll teach you the correct way to walk on this road.”

With a turn of his foot, Shan Zhu pulled Ling Meng into the adjacent grove. Even the illumination of the street lights couldn’t reach into the grove, so the lighting depended entirely on the moon.

“Shh—-” Shan Zhu pushed Ling Meng against a tree and made a shushing gesture.

The two people stood quietly for a long time, then Shan Zhu asked: “Did you hear anything?”

“There’s someone in the five o’clock direction.”

He listened again: “It seems to be also at nine o’clock.”

Shan Zhu: …..

Ling Meng: …..

“Alright, alright, I’m a Galaxy dog, I admit it.”

Shan Zhu leaned close to him and lowered his voice: “You don’t really think abusing dogs as a couple is as easy as walking from east to west?”

Ling Meng admitted: “I’m not really as experienced as you are.”

“I don’t have experience either, but I’m not blind.”

Ling Meng got angry, Why’d you just turn around and say I’m blind! I just didn’t see what I shouldn’t have seen!

“I know I’m lacking in experience, let’s go!”

Just as he was about to leave, he was caught by Shan Zhu and pressed back against the tree. When he disagreed, he was kissed forcefully again. Ling Meng whined and gave up: But you haven’t won rock-paper-scissors yet!

Shan Zhu blocked this little sound too and he pushed back in, sucking his soft lips passionately, breathing in the faint refreshing lemon aroma between them.

Ling Meng’s brain had been blank when the first time he was kissed, had switched between blank and distracted the second time; this time his thoughts wandered with ease:

Porn anchor strongly kisses the clear stream anchor late at night; if this got out, it would incur the wrath of both man and god!

Why is it always me who is kissed? If I played rock-paper-scissors, I may not always lose.

What’s the point of kissing, I don’t believe it’s more fun than playing games.

Shan Zhu invaded one step further and Ling Meng’s lack of oxygen created an illusion of pleasure, as if some parts of his soul had sublimated.

In the dark, courage overtakes shame; he had nowhere to put his hand other than around the other’s neck and, after getting that hint, Shan Zhu also instinctively wrapped his hand around the right side of Ling Meng’s waist.

“Ah.”

Ling Meng subconsciously shrank back and Shan Zhu immediately released him, pulling up his shirt to carefully check his wound.

“Did I hurt you?”

Ling Meng saw the nervous look on his face in the moonlight, but he was unexpectedly a bit upset. He had stepped on the brake too hard and directly stalled out the engine.

“No, it was also a reflex for me.”

Shan Zhu took a deep breath: “That’s good, I forgot about it.”

“What bad luck,” Ling Meng glanced at the time, “the dorm is closing.”

“Let’s go!”

Factoring in that Ling Meng couldn’t exercise vigorously, Shan Zhu pulled Ling Meng along in a fast walk. They arrived at the dormitory entrance only one minute before the entrance guard.

“See you tomorrow,” Shan Zhu had no time to send him back, he would be locked out within a minute.

“Wait a minute!” Ling Meng pulled him down by the neck, got up on his tiptoes, and skimmed a kiss across Shan Zhu’s lips.

“Making up for the engine.”

After kissing him, he turned and ran, and Shan Zhu was both delighted and anxious behind his back: “Don’t run! Walk slowly!”

Ling Meng waved his hand and disappeared into the dormitory door. Shan Zhu gazed longingly for a moment and then ran wildly in the opposite direction, making it up the steps just in time to catch the Dorm Auntie locking the door.

“Auntie, wait!” He ran the three steps to the door and stopped and smiled at the Auntie who had stopped to wait for him. “Thank you, Auntie.”

The Dorm Auntie had looked after the dormitory for more than 20 years, she was familiar with the expression on Shan Zhu’s face. The young in love had a special kind of aura around them that couldn’t be concealed in the slightest.

“Now, child, ah, when you’re playing with your girlfriend, you can’t come back at the last minute.”

“Sorry, I’ll pay attention next time.” The hormones that an in-love Shan Zhu emitted affected girls and aunties alike.

The Dorm Auntie saw such a handsome young man laughing so charmingly and her attitude softened: “Come in! Next time you come back late, shout at the window for me. Don’t run, what if you fall?”

Chapter 57

The flower of the department once again came to find Ling Meng. This time, one of the recently-graduated alumni girls had started an independent business, a cake shop on the Snack Street with an official opening of June 6th. She wanted to ask the popular Lemon Ice-Ge and Mango Lao-Ge from the cultural festival to help out on opening day by advertising in the street.

When Ling Meng heard the reward was a gift card on behalf of the cake shop, he agreed without hesitation. Shan Zhu said he wanted to speak to the female alumni (xuejie) on the phone; he mumbled and conspired and then agreed.

“How are you supposed to wear this thing?”

In the dressing room, Ling Meng was confused by what looked like an apron.

“I’ll help you.”

Ling Meng turned to see the already well-dressed Shan Zhu. He had to say that he really had the ability to wear anything; adding on the upper part of a white chef uniform, he could be sent behind the glass window and, in minutes, pass himself off as a high-ranking cake artist.

Shan Zhu helped Ling Meng put the uniform on and also secured a mango pin to his chest.

“Hey? Why are you wearing my pin?” It was only then that he noticed Shan Zhu had the lemon pin he gave him on his chest.

“Because I want to keep you in my heart.”

Ling Meng: o///_////o

“You, when did you get a sex reassignment surgery?”

Shan Zhu smiled and put his hand on his shoulder to push Ling Meng forward: “There’s a live broadcast today. Pay attention to your personal image.”

His roommate had been waiting with a long selfie stick at the dressing room door. As soon as Ling Meng appeared on camera, he received many praises of “so meng”, “so adorable”, and “so want to push down”.

Ling Meng’s first outdoor stream; he was a little reserved as he waved his hand at the camera: “Daddy’s here.”

— Daddy is so young today.

— Daddy’s apron, full marks.

— Mango Pin, full marks.

When it was Shan Zhu’s turn, it turned into “so handsome” “so handsome” “so handsome” ….“so want to be pushed down” and “Lemon Pin, full marks”.

“You all really have a double standard, don’t you?” Ling Meng wasn’t satisfied. Clearly their uniforms were the same.

— I’m proud to be called double-standard dog.

— What double standard? Clearly both pins received full marks.

The xuejie smiled as she came over with a sample tray: “Thank you for your help.”

“N-no, you’re welcome.” Ling Meng was forced back into his original form for a moment.

— MengMeng is showing a suspicious blush.

— Wow, grown-up shop beauty.

— MengMeng, don’t lose your grip when you see a beautiful woman! You’re a family man!

“It’s n-not controllable,” Ling Meng said in annoyance.

“My family’s MengMeng is not that kind of person,” Shan Zhu stood up for him.

— Mang God put full upgrade points into his sacrificial skill.

— Mang God: No one can say that my family’s MengMeng is not good.

Ling Meng and Shan Zhu each stood outside with sample trays. Each tray had a lot of small sample pieces of cake with toothpicks in them.

“Your cake looks pretty tasty,” Ling Meng stared at Shan Zhu’s sampler.

“Have a taste?” Shan Zhu picked up a piece and placed it in Ling Meng’s mouth.

“Mm, it’s delicious.” He picked up one of his and fed it to Shan Zhu, “You try mine too.”

“Mango flavor.”

— yo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

— I also tasted the sweet cake across the screen!!

— Don’t taste-test it, ba. Feed this whole plate to MengMeng!

— Can we brush a cat climbing tree to buy a piece of cake and call on Mang God to feed it to MengMeng?

“Brushing a cat climbing tree will not buy cake. But the store owner-jiejie prepared some benefits for the broadcast studio water friends….” Ling Meng forgot the memorized pitch and looked to Shan Zhu for help, “What is it?”

“Weibo forwarding drawings for ten stackable containers, which can be picked up in the store or sent via refrigerated delivery using the national mail service.”

“Yes, yes, there are mango containers, soy milk containers, oreo containers….”

— A lemon container!

“No lemon container, why would you want to eat something sour?”

— Who dares to call lemon is sour? I’ll plaster the broadcast studio link on his face!

— Since watching MengMeng live, I have suffered from diabetes.

— I went to buy insulin and the doctor looked at my giggling face and warned me to watch less streams.

“In addition, there are special benefits for North Hebei water friends. Today’s first three water friends who come to the store will enjoy a waiver rate of around 100 yuan. They can also make an excessive request on the spot. Our address is 66th Snack Street, University City. Daddy is waiting for you, yo!” Ling Meng took advantage of selling meng with dedication.

— Ao ao ao, I’m by SenLan (company about 2 hours from YanShan Uni), I’m on my way! MengMeng, wait for me!

— Those on the scene can demand a princess carry!

— Very envious of the little friends from North Hebei!

— Asking for the North Hebei university admissions scores for next year’s college exam T口T

The news of the Cultural Festival’s Two Dessert Men coming out again was also sent to passers-by on the intranet BBS. Those who regretted having missed seeing the real people’s style last time quickly lined up at the cake shop door.

“Thank you all for coming, please come in in order. Live streaming, so if you don’t want to be in the frame, please stand behind the cameraman. Thank you for understanding.”

Ling Meng emptied one sample plate after another and the shop owner took the opportunity to launch a drink car. Dozens of cups of special lemon drinks were swept way.

“Those who like our products, please scan the QR code.” Ling Meng stood in the crowd with a huge QR code sign and did the publicity in a serious manner.

A pretty girl teased him, “Is the QR code your WeChat?”

“O-of course not, it’s the public number of the shop.”

“Can you post on your Weibo about the public number?”

Ling Meng blushed and didn’t know how to answer. Shan Zhu held him from behind, “Sorry, oh, we don’t provide this service. Pay attention to the public number for a 10% coupon.”

The broadcast room audience was also protesting strongly.

— What? Follow the public number and you want WeChat? We don’t even give WeChat to those who gift cat courtyards!

— If I could see the real MengMeng, I’d be dizzy!

— MengMeng, raise the sign a little higher, I also want to scan!

The first water friend who arrived at the scene successfully reported Ling Meng’s broadcast room number and got the discount. Ling Meng was very glad he was a boy, so he wasn’t nervous during the interview.

“Congratulations to the first water friend who got the hundred yuan discount. Do you have anything you’d like to say to the audience? Just say anything you want.”

“I have been Lemon Dad’s black powder for a long time. I was still at the star diamond level when I received Lemon Dad’s hospice care. I’ve kept the screenshot to this very day.”

“Wow, then you really are an old black powder.” He was star diamond rank half a year ago.

“Lemon Dad, jiayou; I will always try to blacken you!”

“….thank you so much!”

— Focus on the main point! Request, request!

— Princess carry! Cake feeding!

— Ask to see Mang God and MengMeng couple-drink lemonade!

“What do you want?” Ling Meng didn’t forget to add, “You can’t go too far.”

“I want to ride in the black car together with Lemon Dad and his good friends!”

Ling Meng was relieved: “This is no problem, ah, leave your ID and I’ll add you.”

— Straight man, don’t waste your request, hey!

— This one doesn’t count, another!

— Upcoming water friends, can you make interesting requests?!

The second water friend was very straight forward: “I’m here to help my girlfriend’s status. She is Lemon Dad’s powder and wants an autographed Lemon Dad photo.”

— Bogus! At first glance, bogus!

— How can you play Galaxy and have a girlfriend.

— I give this water friend 100 points on the excuse, the extra 99 will be sent to your virtual girlfriend

— There is only one request left. Can you make an interesting request this time, for the friends that can’t, ah!

At last there was a crowd-insider lined up: “Er…what should I ask for? People, tell me; I’ll listen to the will of the people.”

— Feed the cake, feed the cake!

— Couple-drink, couple-drink!

Finally, the couple-drink won by a small margin. Ling Men wanted to say there were no drinks available but the store owner brought out two huge cups of the special lemon drink.

“You’ve been thirsty for so long, right? Have a drink.”

— This is awesome!

— Shop Owner Beauty, I can see your shop will be prosperous!

— Wait until I come back for your membership card!

For the sake of the membership cards, Ling Meng went all out. The two people were very close to each other, able to brush noses as they were drinking. When he was halfway through the drink, Ling Meng raised his eyes and directly met Shan Zhu’s gaze. He immediately lowered his eyes again, intently staring at the straw.

— MengMeng is shy!

— MengMeng’s eyes are beautiful!

— Requesting a screenshot of the moment the eyes met!

— There is only MengMeng in Mang God’s eyes, but only a straw in the eyes of MengMeng!

Ling Meng quickly finished the large cup and jumped away to free himself, “Is that alright?”

“You didn’t have to drink it all at once,” Shan Zhu lamented, “What if your stomach cramps?”

“Ah? You didn’t say so earlier! But then again, it’s delicious.”

“So good you want to have another drink?” the store owner said.

“No, no,” Ling Meng quickly waved his hand, “not for a while.”

The cake shop’s business was excellent. Not only were the finished products sold out, a lot of reservations were put in.

The store boss put the agreed-upon gift card in Ling Meng’s hands: “This is the promised reward. Wait a little for us to give a special gift.”

“A gift as well? What is it?”

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you….”

Shan Zhu brought a huge birthday cake out of the cake room, followed by the cake chef and all the shop assistants. The singer wasn’t Shan Zhu, but Ling Meng’s roommate holding the camera for the live broadcast.

— Ah, ah, ah, today is MengMeng’s birthday?

— MengMeng’s birthday is the 6th!

— Happy birthday to MengMeng!

— Who is singing?

— Warm, lonely? (joke from some song lyrics: who is singing warm, lonely…)

Ling Meng was very surprised: “How do you know my birthday?”

Huo LongGuo raised his hand: “He asked me!”

“I wanted to take you to play today, but we got caught up with this. I discussed with xuejie about celebrating your birthday in the shop.”

“Wow,” Ling Meng was moved. “Thank you, xuejie; thank you, Mang God; thank you, spirit behind the camera and all the shop staff.

— Just now, the voiceover turned out to be the spirit behind him?

— Back Spirit-Ge! I miss your dancing!

He turned his phone towards himself, imitating an Indian dance posture and moving his neck from side to side.

— Back Spirit-Ge is still so dynamic!

— Come often to the stream in the future, ah!

[Platform Announcement] User Guava has gifted a cat courtyard to anchor Lemon and included this message of encouragement: Happy birthday.

[Platform Announcement] User Pineapple has gifted a cat courtyard to anchor Lemon and included this message of encouragement: Lemon Daddy, happy bday, oh~ Aren’t I familiar, I’m Pineapple-chan~~~~

[Platform Announcement] User LittleFlyingTeddy has gifted a cat courtyard to anchor Lemon and included this message of encouragement: Happy birthday, I want to draw you a lifelike avatar.

[Platform Announcement] User LoveLifeLoveLemon has gifted a cat courtyard to anchor Lemon and included this message of encouragement: Love you —– your eternal mother barrier powder

……

Ling Meng was moved by the sea of cat courtyards.

“Thank you all, this is the first time so many people have celebrated my birthday.”

— Don’t cry! MengMeng, don’t cry!

“Who’s crying,” Ling Meng laughed and scolded, “I was just a little moved, okay?”

The xuejie on behalf of the whole store gave him a cake and his roommate gave him a new pair of headphones. As for Shan Zhu, who knows when he ran to the back to carry out a large lemon plushie nearly the height of a person.

Ling Meng was stunned: “Where did you buy such a big lemon?”

“Custom-made, with your super fierce expression on it.”

Ling Meng: >皿<

Ling Meng took a closer look; it was really true.

“But it’s so big, where am I going to put it?”

“I discussed this with our xuejie. Temporarily keep it in the shop and later put it in our house.”

— Did I just catch some keywords with my keen ears?

— What does it seem I vaguely heard through my 800,000-watt hearing aid?

— Our….house?

— This conjugal love show is very good, I give full marks!

Shan Zhu gave the lemon to Ling Meng: “I’ve been happy every day since I met you and I hope you’ll be happy every day in the future too.”

Ling Meng giggled and hugged the lemon, which was almost taller than him, “Thank you.”

“This is the second gift I’ve given to you.”

“Second gift? What was the first one?”

“Isn’t it already on you?”

— Already on the body???

— Watching the day’s stream, I didn’t find any kiss marks on MengMeng’s body, ah.

— Maybe it’s somewhere we can’t see.

Ling Meng bowed his head and looked at it: “You mean this?”

When he pointed to the mango pin on his chest, he got a nod from Shan Zhu.

“This five cent thing is a birthday present too?” Ling Meng laughed at him.

— Shocked!! The million-dollar anchor gave his boyfriend a gift worth five cents!

“It’s not for sale, it’s priceless,” Shan Zhu said without any shame.

They lit the candles and everyone shouted for Ling Meng to make a wish. Ling Meng thought over it for a moment, opening his mouth to say:

“Thank you for my birthday today, all you water friends in the broadcast. Thank you for all coming to watch me stream regardless of whether I sell cake, play games, have surgery, mine, or chat…”

— You’re aware of it! Take a look at what you’ve done when you’re live!

— So you really are a variety anchor!

“I hope there will be more variety presented to you in the future. Now, my wish is…

“To always be the Daddy who dotes on you.” Ling Meng made a heart gesture with his hands towards the camera.

— Hahaha, silly Daddy. Don’t you know that the wish can’t be said! out! loud!

— Dropping it, satisfying you for this one day, Lemon Daddy!

— Nobody’s going to shout MengMeng tonight! Call me Father!

“I would also like to thank a person. If not for him, I wouldn’t have joined the path of anchoring and wouldn’t have received so much love and attention. I would also like to thank him for finding so many people to wish me happy birthday, uh…”

— Good. So who is he [smile]

— We really can’t guess at all [smile]

— How can you be shy when you call yourself Daddy [smile]

Ling Meng threw caution to the wind: “Aren’t you going to live-kiss? Come on, it’ll be a birthday service!”

Out of the frame, Shan Zhu raised his eyebrows, meaning ‘you really want me to come?’

Wolves howled all over the broadcast room.

— Hot!!!!!! Kiss!!!!!!

— Lemon Dad, I salute you as a man!!!

— Ah ah ah, wait for me to change from my phone to my tablet! I want to see it clearly!!!

— At this moment, I’m lustfully smiling like a beast.

“See it clearly!” Ling Meng pulled Shan Zhu over by his collar, grabbing the big lemon with his other hand. The camera was completely blocked; beyond the >皿<, the audience couldn’t see anything.

— Are you kidding me???

— Why should I believe you, you scheming lemon!!!

— How can a man be like this!!!

— Give me back the cat climbing tree I brushed!

— Report this unscrupulous anchor for playing with the feelings of the water friends!

— Back Spirit-Ge, requesting you go around to the back to shoot!

— Why did Mang God have to give such a big lemon!!

Ling Meng moved the lemon away and licked the corner of his mouth, a conspiratorial expression on his face.

“Well, this segment is over. The next step is for us to eat cake live!”

— Didn’t see. Don’t eat.

— Leaving, byebye.

— Sad, taking off.

— Turning black. Bye.

“Don’t go, this cake looks so delicious!”

“Oh, yeah,” the store owner, who hadn’t interjected, suddenly raised her phone, “Just now, I took a photo behind them and it seems I accidentally caught this.”

“…jiejie!!!”

— Shop Owner Beauty, I love you!!!

— Won’t you print a huge photo and hang it in the shop!!!

— I want to apply for your membership card! How much did you say it cost!!!

— Don’t say anything, give out the online store address, outside water friends also want to glow hot!!!

Ling Meng looked at Shan Zhu with a stunned expression. Shan Zhu spread his hands and put on a ‘how could I know this would happen, I didn’t suddenly grab you to kiss’ attitude.

Ling Meng, who carelessly used the big trick [Sacrificing Life For Honor], really wanted to dig a hole for himself and jump in. If he knew, he wouldn’t have done it. He had honestly thought, wouldn’t it be good to hide behind a big lemon and laugh?

—

Footnotes:

1. understand everything (理都懂): internet slang for I understand everything you’re saying (knowing the meaning beneath the words)

2. eating melon: melon is the Gua in Guava/Guawa; also figuratively means to be an onlooker

3. couple-drink (交杯酒): Chinese marriage custom, though this has become a thing all over the world, when a couple links elbows so their arms cross and their faces are close and they both drink from a separate cup

—

I added some fanart for this section to this page >><<

I was too busy facepalming at Guava to truly enjoy this section, lol