Maybe a Fake Gintama

Chapter 518: The Direction in the Mirror is Opposite

On the other side, Gintoki, who had just walked out of the cake shop, casually reminded Chin Pirako while tucking his hands into his kimono pockets, "Next time there's any gang behavior, I'm going to add another 'Bira' to your name, turning it into Man Birabirabirabirabirako. That way, your name will become more and more like a girl's."

"How is that anything like a girl? It's more like a 'birabira' monster by now!" Shinpachi retorted forcefully. "And you were told to stop adding 'birabira'!"

"Hey, there's a cute dried goods shop over there-aru," Kagura suddenly pointed across the street to a dried goods store. "Wanna check it out? *****!."

"Don't remove all the 'bira'!" Shinpachi pointed at Kagura, roaring in frustration.

Ignoring Shinpachi's rant, Kagura went to the dried goods shop, picked up two dried seaweeds, and crunched them, "Look, look, Man Birako, it's dry~ Crunchy crunchy~."

"Ah~ so cute~ Why is it so dry~" Man... sorry, my mistake, Chin Pirako said, covering her cheeks and acting coy.

"You've only been choosing places you want to go since a while ago! Why is a dried goods store the most ladylike place?" Shinpachi shouted, his veins bulging. "And even that three-dimensional gorilla got the name wrong earlier!"

"Bro..."

Chin Pirako turned to say something to Gintoki but got interrupted by a burly, scarred, bald man bumping into her, and her intended words were lost.

As soon as she finished speaking, the man clutched the arm he had just bumped, screamed in agony, and fell backward.

"Ah—!!" The scarred man writhed on the ground in pain, screaming continuously.

A bespectacled henchman with a crew cut quickly crouched and shouted, "Boss! What's wrong?!"

"It's broken! The bump just now completely broke it!" The bald man's acting was so convincing it seemed like his arm was broken.

[Real gangsters have appeared!!]Gintoki and Shinpachi were instantly distressed.

However, at this delicate moment, a foot lightly stepped on the still-rolling bald man's left arm, and it sounded like something cracked.

"Ah—!! It's broken, it's truly broken!" Cold sweat covered the bald man's face as he screamed.

"Wow, impressive little girl," the foot owner—Kawaki—looked at Chin Pirako, pretending to be shocked, "Just a light bump, and you fractured his bone."

[An even more troublesome guy has arrived!!]Gintoki and Shinpachi's faces went completely dark.

"Hey, you got it wrong," Tsukuyo, who had arrived at some point, observed the man screaming in pain on the ground and casually mentioned, "Wasn't it the left arm that broke? Why are you holding your right arm?"

"Probably too much pain to care," Kawaki casually said, then stepped again on the bald man's left leg.

Crack, a bone-breaking sound that everyone could hear sounded.

"Ah—!!" The bald man's eyes widened as the actual pain of Kawaki breaking his left leg sent his voice hoarse.

"He he he, really sorry about that, got it wrong again," Kawaki scratched the back of his head and laughed awkwardly, then lifted his foot again with a grin, "Hey, quickly tell me which arm broke; I definitely won't get it wrong this time."

The bald man could only scream...

"Can't be helped, then. I just have to try them one by one. From five limbs, three are left to choose from, and in a multiple-choice question I'm quite good at these," Kawaki said as he stepped towards the man's right leg, "This one's the longest; choosing this must be right."

Crack.

"Uh..." The bald man could only utter a faint moan, no longer able to scream.

"Little Uncle, no, wrong-aru, it should be the left arm," Kagura came over and forcibly broke the sunglasses-wearing henchman's left arm.

[What are you messing up?!]Gintoki and Shinpachi roared in their minds.

"No, no, Kagua-chan," Kawaki raised a finger and shook it, "When two people stand facing each other, it should be the opposite, which means..."

Saying this, Kawaki kicked the henchman's left calf bone, breaking it.

"It should be the left leg!"

[You're totally wrong!]Gintoki and Shinpachi shouted internally.

"No, that's wrong," Tsukuyo approached, kicking straight at the groin of the sunglasses-wearing henchman, "It should be here."

[It's crushed!!]Gintoki and Shinpachi felt a chill below.

"Hey hey, these two guys are too pitiful~" Kawaki looked at the henchmen lying on the ground, unable even to roll, spread his hands and sighed, "This little girl went too far, smashing these two into this state, Gintoki, is this a new member of Yorozuya?"

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Gintoki immediately clenched his teeth, grabbing Kawaki's shirt, "It was all done by you alone, right?! It has nothing to do with us or that girl!"

"What did I do?" Kawaki looked innocent.

"Nothing at all; we were just passing by!" The group of Hyakka ladies shouted in unison.

Gintoki then realized that the Hyakka members had already tightly encircled them. People outside on the street couldn't see the situation inside.

"What the hell are you trying to do?!" Gintoki squeezed the words out of his throat with suppressed anger.

"What are you talking about, Gintoki?" Kawaki put on an air of innocence, squinted, and smiled, "I just happened to pass by and saw your new member bullying innocent thugs."

"It has nothing to do with Man Birabirabirabirabirako!" Gintoki ground his teeth.

"Amazing! She has so many..." Kawaki turned his head towards Chin Pirako in amazement, "Indeed, a new member of Yorozuya. But since it has nothing to do with her, does that mean it was all you?"

"Hey, you wouldn't do such pranks without reason; what's your purpose..."

"Gintoki! You even instructed your subordinate to attack two thugs just passing by!" Kawaki covered his mouth in shock, "Have you fallen that low?!"

"You bastard!!"

"Anyway, let's call an ambulance for these two innocent thugs first..." Kawaki casually knocked Gintoki's hand away and took out his phone, kindly calling an ambulance for the two thugs.

"Hello, yes, at Kabukicho Block 3, two innocent thugs who were just passing by got their bones broken by a subordinate under the command of a silver-haired, naturally wavy-haired samurai in his late twenties or almost thirty from a business called Yorozuya."

After ending the call, Kawaki again turned to Gintoki with a refreshing smile.

"Don't worry, Gintoki, the ambulance will be here soon."

Without giving Gintoki a chance to shout, Kawaki, accompanied by Tsukuyo and the other Hyakka members, turned and left.

Before leaving, Kawaki glanced at Chin Pirako, who had been silent since his arrival, and slightly curved his lips, winking at her.

"Hold on," Gintoki suddenly called out to Kawaki, "What... are you up to? Pulling all of Yoshiwara's defenses, what are you planning?"

"Just picking a gift for my nephew." Kawaki didn't look back as he responded, then sighed, "After all, it's the first time that guy has ever asked me for a gift since he was little. As an elder, I should at least fulfill his wish once, right?"

"Kamui-aru?!" Kagura suddenly got upset, "Why are you picking a gift for that idiot-aru? No need! Just give it to me!"

"Sorry, Kagura, I've already bought enough gifts for you." Kawaki waved his hand behind him, "This time, it's that kid's turn."

Watching Kawaki's gradually receding, Gintoki's expression became solemn.

"Gin-san, I think you better not pay attention to that side," Shinpachi lifted his glasses and expressionlessly said, "We should focus on our current situation. Passersby are watching and pointing, and now, thanks to what Kawaki-san said, we've been completely marked as the culprits. Plus, if these two guys are from Jirochou's gang..."

"That bastard, it's deliberate!" Gintoki muttered through clenched teeth.

"We need to clear this up before the ambulance arrives," Shinpachi whispered a reminder.

"Shinpachi, there are two people with fractures on their side, and we need to have someone on our side with a full-body comminuted fracture!" Gintoki said thoughtfully, then turned to look at Shinpachi, "Shinpachi, the time has come for you to sacrifice yourself for the boss!"

"Cut it out a bit!" Shinpachi shouted, veins popping, "Why am I the only one taking the blame in this situation? I don't want a fracture!"

"So what do you suggest?!" Gintoki glared with red eyes, staring intently at Shinpachi, "That bastard didn't think about the consequences when he did those things! Now, even if we argue that the idiot did it, no one will believe it, so what do you suggest I do?! Shinpachi, just you, then! Could you please have a full-body comminuted fracture temporarily? I'll count it as a work injury! I'll even give you all my treasured photo albums! Please!"

"I don't want that kind of stuff!" Shinpachi yelled, "It should be you who gets a comminuted fracture!"